Friday, May 12, 2006

My Secret Fantasies Revealed

One of my recurring fantasies is that I go back to age twelve or so knowing everything I know now. I’d get to live my life over without all the screw ups. Best of all, my teen years would not be marred by perpetual angst and misery, and I would be the coolest kid in the world. Oh, and I would make timely investments based on my knowledge of what was about to happen and become independently wealthy at a very young age. I’d become a famous trend spotter. I’d have to arrange things so that I would be sure to marry Mrs Vache Folle and find all the dogs I have had over the years, but otherwise there is no limit to what I might change.

Another fantasy is that I discover that I have powers like the character Q on Star Trek. I don’t think I would abuse them or anything. I would keep my powers secret and make folks think I am just really talented and hard working. You’ll know if this fantasy comes true because I’ll be the Cinderella story of all time, a middle aged man with no prior pitching experience comes out of nowhere and wins 30 games for the Yankees. The same year, I will break Brian Lara’s and Sir Gary Sober’s batting records in test cricket playing for the West Indies. Then I’ll win the Academy Award for Best Actor and the National Book Award. I would broker world peace and get the Nobel, too. Everybody would be sick of me since I’d be more ubiquitous than Paris Hilton.

These fantasies reflect my biggest regrets in life. I regret that I was not born into a wealthy family or that I never stumbled on a fortune. If I had been rich, I wouldn’t have gone to college or law school or been in the service.

1 comment:

Libertarian Jason said...

I’ll be the Cinderella story of all time, a middle aged man with no prior pitching experience comes out of nowhere and wins 30 games for the Yankees.

You had me until this statement. I may now have to take you off my blogroll.

Go Orioles!!!!!!!!!!!!!!