Friday, September 05, 2008

Times Square Not Times Square

My favorite kinsmen were in the city for the tennis matches and invited us to dinner on Restaurant Row Friday evening. I went straight from the office in Westchester, and Mrs Vache Folle stayed in Midtown and killed time by shopping. I was way early, so I took a stroll over to Times Square and Broadway and 42nd Street. It was hopping on a Friday evening what with all the tourists and theater-goers.

I first visited Times Square almost 30 years ago when it was blessed with hookers and junkies and "adult" businesses. I enjoyed my first peep show and my first hummer for cash. Good times.

It's all changed now. It's a tourist's dream. There is so much to choose from in the city that never sleeps. At 46th and Broadway, there's an enormous Olive Garden restaurant. If that's too exotic for your tastes, only a couple of blocks away is a Ruby Tuesdays. There's even an Applebees just off Broadway on 42nd. For those who are looking for the true cosmopolitan experience, check out Planet Hollywood or the Hard Rock Cafe. Times Square has become pretty much every mall in every middling city in America, only with the risk of death by cab and with lots of crazies handing out flyers for stuff. To pay for sex, you have to go all the way to 8th Avenue.

Don't get me wrong. There are tons of great restaurants, and the theatre is not to be disdained, except for the Disney stuff that the tourists eat up and revivals. But just think of the visitors from flyover country who come to Times Square, gawk at the signage, and eat at the Olive Garden after taking in a double decker gray line bus tour. Then they pay big bucks to see the freaking Lion King. Thanks a lot, Rudy.

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