More About Names

Almost everybody in our family gets a nickname. Even our dogs have nicknames. Jasper is "Boom Boom", "Boo Boo Kitty", or "Sir Frogs a Lot". Jesse is "Mister BIster" or "Bister" or "Bissah Boo" or "Bagbag". They seem to know their nicknames. We use their surnames when we want to talk about them without drawing their attention. Mr Stone and Mr Baggett is how we refer to them in those cases. Mr Baggett's pretty much deaf now, so I don't reckon it matters what we call him. The best way to get Mr Stone to come to you is to call Mr Baggett.

We had a dog a few years ago who had been born deaf. We taught her commands in the form of hand signals. She was pretty obedient, but if she didn't want to obey, she'd turn away and pretend she couldn't see you. Her name was Trudy, short for the Intruder, as the other dogs considered her. She became Toodle, Woodle, Doodball, and the Fly (in the ointment). Cassidy the hellhound was Cassy, Caster, Caster Disaster. Her evil sibling Sundance was Sunny, Bunny and Boo.

Mrs Vache Folle calls me Honey or Booberry. She's Goo. I don't know how that came about.

I've been known as Toby, Desi, and Buck at various times in my life, none of which resemble my name. My father is Rooster, and almost everyone knows him as such. My brother is Sport, and I swear that most people think that's his right name. Dad and bubba are senior and junior of the same name. My sister never had a nickname, except in her bowling league, where she was known as Pollack for reasons that escape me. She accidentally named her kids with names that have a pretty good foundation in family history. Her grandkids have Arabic names, but they'll doubtless be tagged with more crackery nicknames in due time. Hassan will become Hoss and Falestine will be known as Tina.

Mrs Vache Folle and her brother both go by their middle names. So does my mother, and so did her father. Her nephews use their made up Keystone Kracker middle names as well. I rarely even acknowledge that I have a middle name. It's Alan, a name that is good only for extra emergency back up names. It goes with Edgar Allan Poe or Rodney Alan Rippy but is otherwise of little use. I suppose you could be an Al, but that could be Albert or Alexander or Alphonso or some other interesting name.

In my family, almost every Mary was a Polly, every Martha was a Patsy, every Margaret was a Peggy.