New Unjokes

Set up: How do you tell the bride at an Italian wedding?
Punchline: She's usually the one in a white dress up in front of the church.

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Vache.
Vache who?
Vache Folle.

Set up: What's the difference between ignorance and apathy?
Punchline: Ignorance describes a state wherein one has no knowledge, whereas apathy indicates an absence of interest or concern.

A cow walks into a bar and orders a martini. The bartender says "We don't get many talking cows in here." The cow says nothing and leaves without paying.

A Frenchman, a German, and a Pole are on walkabout and arrange to spend the night in farmer's barn. The farmer warns them that they had better stay away from his beautiful daughter and that he'll be sleeping with one eye open and a shotgun at the ready. The Frenchman and the German decide that it would be foolhardy to mess with the farmer's daughter, but the Pole decides he'll give it a try. He sneaks up to the farmhouse and climbs in the window, whereupon the vigilant farmer shoots him dead.

Set up: What do you call a hundred lawyers on the bottom of Lake George?
Punchline: A mystery.