Tuesday, May 29, 2007

Ideas for TV Shows

I have been tossing around some ideas for TV programs, and I think I have hit on a winning formula. Take 60s and 70s TV shows and remake them but with a 21st century edge.

For example, Gomer Pyle USMC’s comedic potential was never fully exploited by having Gomer’s unit deployed to Vietnam. Just think of all the hilarious situations that goofball Pyle could get into in a war zone. In the end, though, he would always pull Sergeant Carter’s chestnuts out of the fire. Imagine Pyle a captive of the VC and engaged in a game of Russian Roulette like in the Deer Hunter. He wins every game! “Golly, Sergeant Carter, back in Mayberry we play this game all the time! Me and Goober was county champs.” Or when Pyle inadvertently massacres an entire village of civilians but it turns out that they were VC after all. Probably.

Imagine Mister Ed where you’re not quite sure if Mr Ed really talks or if Wilbur is just psychotic, especially since Mr Ed is always telling Wilbur to kill people. Mr Ed always comes up with a cunning plan to thwart investigators or to hide the bodies. You could have CSI do a cross episode with the New Mr Ed.

Imagine a Gilligan’s Island a lot more like Lord of the Flies or Lost. Heck, just have the castaways from the SS Minnow on the Losties island at war with the Others. It will be a prequel set in the 1960s even before the Dharma Initiative, which it turns out was funded by Thurston Howell, III. It would explain so much, like all the money and luggage taken on a three hour tour.

Or take I Dream of Jeannie or Bewitched and get rid of the insane patriarchal bastards who want their omnipotent wives/girlfriends to cool it on the gnarly powers. Let them appreciate the women’s abilities and indulge in them for revenge, pleasure, and power. Darren could quit his soul destroying job as an ad man and do anything he pleased, for crying out loud. “Screw you, Larry, I’m king of the world.” Captain Nelson could explore distant galaxies via Jeannie’s powers of teleportation. How could Samantha and Jeannie have fallen for those schmucks? Endora was right. Let’s fix that huge hole in the premise of those shows and make them interesting.

Remember the Flying Nun? In our version, not only can she fly, but she has a variety of other superpowers as well which she uses to advance truth, justice and the Roman Catholic way. She has the Rosary of Truth and the Crucifix of Time Travel in her quiver. She also has the Habit of Invisibility.

Wouldn’t Bonanza be more interesting if the Cartwrights were all werewolves? Only Hop Sing knows their terrible secret.

You get the picture. Isn’t this the kind of programming you’d like to see?

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