It is my misfortune to know that Dr Phil has teamed up with match dot com, an on-line dating service, to dispense his dubious wisdom. Match dot com advertises on the Rachel Maddow radio show to which I tune in every morning during my 40 mile commute. Every morning, we hear his drawled advice: “Don’t want. Get!” He tells us not to bemoan our wants but to go out and make things happen for ourselves.
A particularly confusing piece of advice is that love is not “like the pizza man going door to door looking for a life partner”. This analogy is not apt. Pizza men only come to your door if you have ordered a pizza. They don’t pick up pizzas on spec and peddle them door to door. If somebody has ordered up a life partner, you might be well served to knock on his or her door if you are also looking for one. And isn’t that pretty much what match dot come is all about?
Dr Phil’s advice seems so obvious once you hear it. Homeless? Get a house! It’s that simple. All you homeless people need to get up off your homeless asses and sign some leases. Disease ridden? Get healed!
Some things might be our own fault, as when we decry our loneliness all the while taking no steps to meet people. Of course, we may be socially phobic or have other issues that keep us out of society, in which case Dr Phil’s advice to go out and develop a meaningful relationship will be a nonstarter.
I am pretty sure I could do Dr Phil’s job, and I am not even a “doctor”. Folks would tell me their problems, and I would tell them their troubles are their own fault and due to their laziness and stupidity. I would tell them to fix their problems themselves. They would pay me.