Friday, April 29, 2005

The Long John Silvers Jones

If I were on death row and offered a last meal, I might order Long John Silvers fish and chips. I love LJS. For two years in high school, I had lunch there almost every day with my buddy Tim "Mr Catamount" Olds. We drove like maniacs to get there, order and eat during our 45 minute liunch break. I slathered on the imported (from Kentucky) malt vinegar while he ate a whole bottle of catsup with his.

There is no LJS anywhere near me in New York. There used to be one in downtown Manhattan, and I made a pilgrimage to its address only to discover that it had long been closed.

When I go home to Dalton "Carpet Capital of the Known Universe", GA, it is all anyone can do to keep me from taking every meal at LJS. The existence of truly superb barbecue lures me away on occasion as does the hope of truly authentic biscuits and gravy. There is an LJS in Wilkes-Barre "Why in God's Name Would Anyone Live Here", PA, and its existence is sometimes enough to induce me to visit in-laws there. When my wife visits her kin, I always ask her to bring back a goodly supply of fish and chicken planks, BUT SHE NEVER DOES. She fails this love test woefully since the LJS is slightly out of her way. 21 years of marriage evidently count for so little.

We stayed in Blue Ridge, GA one year when we visited home, and the LJS there was closed and operating as a no-name fish joint that I dared not try. Why would an LJS ever close?

Why is there no LJS in New York? Is there some regulatory obstacle? My only fish and chips choice, as far as fast food goes, is Arthur Treachers operating as part of Nathans Hot Dogs, and AT is to LJS as feces are to fudge.

I need some LJS bad. I need the crumblies on the side soaked in malt vinegar. I need the hushpuppies and the limp fries. I am dying here. Please open an LJS within 45 minutes of my home. Poughkeepsie would be OK. I would even cross the Hudson into Newburgh if need be.

There is simply no better way to eat fish than encased in LJS's signature batter and deep fried.

UPDATE: It turns out that there is an LJS in Newburgh just 16 miles from home. It is part of a combined KFC/LJS, and I found it on the LJS web-site store locator. Please let it be there when I drive to Newburgh tonight.

2 comments:

bkmarcus said...

Still waiting to hear an update.

Vache Folle said...

I didn't get to go to LJS thanks to the wife's characteristic obstructionism. We did go out for sushi in Hopewell Junction, however. I will get to Newburgh, as God is my witness.