Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Freedom

One of the leading ideas about the origin of the state is the "hydraulic theory". In a nutshell and doing it no service, the theory states that societies dependent on irrigation for agriculture were vulnerable to someone's taking control of the water and exerting power over others. Some warlord and his goons could seize the waterworks or provide protection of the waterworks from other warlords and their goons in exchange for taxes and obedience. I suppose any necessary infrastructure would do as a basis for enslavement.

It seems to me that sedentism is the first requirement. It would be hard, although not impossible, to lord it over foragers. I suppose you could stake out a claim to a hunting ground and demand tribute, but the effort involved in that would exceed the effort involved in being a collaborative forager or the leader of a foraging band. Nomads would be easier to extort from since they need grazing lands and water that you could, in principle, control. This would probably not be very profitable as the sole basis of a protection racket but it might be a good sideline for an already established protostate. Agriculture with its concomitant supluses and the greater division of labor is a prerequisite to a truly profitable racket.

It's possible that some of the early racketeeers may have actually added value by protecting their victims, er subjects, from the ravages of worse racketeers and by extracting less than they might have. Some early racketeers may have hit upon the idea that there was an optimum level of extraction that would generate the most revenue while encouraging industry and the convenient acquiesence of the subjects in the rule of the racketeers. Eventually, some of the racketeers would have discovered the idea of the republic wherein the racketeers would rule under the fiction that they did so with the affirmative consent of the ruled.

The lesson of history, I suppose, is that there is always some asshole who is ready to to serve as your warlord. If you have anyting you care about, that's the source of their power. Freedom, it has bee famously said, is just another word for nothing left to lose.

Monday, August 24, 2009

If I Didn't Self Identify as an Anarchist, How Would Anyone Know I was one?

If I really think about it and am honest with myself, Vache Folle the anarchist isn't very different from Vache Folle the deluded dupe of the state. Sure, I'm disllusioned and have learned as a mental exercise to problematize the concept of the state, but my personal actions aren't much different on account of it. I was never active politically in any event, and I wasn't one to collaborate with the government even when I accepted its legitimacy and necessity without question.

I suppose my attitude is different. Nowadays, I acquiesce in the actions and extractions of the government. I sometimes have to work to avoid feeling bitter and resentful, but by and large I pay my taxes and obey the law (mostly) with indifference. I don't want to be locked up or murdered, so I just go along with it. I like my house, so I pay my property taxes quietly in order to keep it.

If I never expressed an opinion about the state's being problematic, you'd never know my views were anything outside the mainstream. I don't know that my lifestyle is informed in any way by my political views.

Of course, my political views stem from my religious beliefs and these do, albeit not to the extent that one might hope, inform my life choices and the way I treat others.

Friday, August 21, 2009

More Genesis

When we last looked in on Supplanter, he was annoyed at his sons for their mass murder of the males of the city of Shechem and their pillaging. God tells him to move to Bethel. Oddly, since God supposedly already did this three chapters ago, God renames Supplanter Strives With God and promises to multiply his seed just as had been promised to Supplanter's father and grandfather.

In Bethel, Ewe goes into labor and dies in childbirth. As she is dying, she names her new son Son of My Sorrow. Strives With God renames him Son of My Right Hand.

Then Strives With God goes to see his old man He Laughs who, at the age of 180, dies and is buried by Strives With God and He Finishes.

In Genesis 36, just as Father of Multitudes and his nephew had to split up to avoid exceeding the carrying capacity of the land, He Finishes moves away from Strives With God to the hill country of Seir. He has descendants who became known as the Edomites. Some genealogical details are provided but these are neither entertaining or instructive.

Jesse

Jesse Lou Bagget, our superannuated Carpathian Shepherd, hates thunderstorms. This has not been his year. We have had more and more violent thunderstorms this year than I have ever experienced (except in the Tampa area). Consequently, I have had to endure Jesse's pitiable but unremediable discomfort. If it's overnight, I get little sleep because he keeps trying to hide in ridiculously small spaces and makes a mess of things and a huge racket to boot. Jasper the Salopian Terrier is oblivious to the storms.

I would like to get some doggie downers, but I'm afraid that Jesse might be too frail for them. Maybe I'll just lock him out of the bedroom. It's not as if I can console him or anything. Poor old guy. He'd probably piss on stuff if I lock him out. That's how he rolls.

Lately, and I suspect his loss of balance is the cause, Jesse has been pooping while he walks instead of stopping and depositing a pile. Seriously, turds just fly out of his ass, and you have to be careful if you're walking behind him. Sometimes, I think he doesn't even know he's pooping. I find small turds here and there around the house. Fortunately, Jesse's poop is almost always well formed and in small quantities. Jasper, on the other hand, lays cable. It looks as if a dinosaur has taken a crap.

When you live with dogs, you get used to the occasional bodily excretion on the floor. When you get up in the night to pee, you pray that what you stepped in is vomit. Vomit is the least objectional of the canine ejecta. Jesse likes to vomit on the shelves of book cases for some reason, but he rarely vomits. Jasper vomits when his pancreatitits to which he is prone flares up. I had some beagles who seemed to vomit just for the hell of it.

It's hard to see the dogs get old.

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Serenity

I'm not especially apathetic, but I have learned to acquiesce in a lot of bad things because I recognize that I can't do a damned thing about them.

The state, for instance, is only going to get stronger in my lifetime. I'll never see it whither away, mainly because my conspecifics just aren't ready to govern themselves. Their hearts and minds want serious transforming, and I'll never see it until that great gettin' up mornin' bye and bye.

Right wing yahoos are here to stay, too. All I can do is keep my eyes open and be ready to take appropriate action to defend myself from them when I have to.

Bad journalism will always be with us. I just have to work around it and look for alternative sources of information.

Corporatism isn't going away any time soon. I can try to use my power as a consumer to undermine it, and that makes me feel better. Also, I can be a really shitty corporate bureaucrat and undermine the system from within.

As long as I'm married to Mrs Vache Folle, there will be an Idiot Brother in Law. Every precious jewel comes with a curse.

Biting insects will be here as long as there is blood to suck. I'll just have to use OFF.

Despite all these bad things and more, I take pleasure in cultivating my garden and living as mindfully as I am able. Also, there's alcohol and Xanax.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Happy Days are Almost Here Again

The recession may be ending, or so I am told by folks on the radio and the TeeVee. I figured this was the case, because my consumer spending has been way up, and I'm one of the leading economic indicators. As I go, so goes the economy. When I got laid off a couple of years ago, we went into retrenchment mode, then our home equity disappeared almost overnight and our 401(k)s shriveled up. Now, we're thinking prospects are looking up, and we're buying stuff. And we didn't need a government stimulus to get us going, although the fact that GOP bozos aren't in charge has had a lot to do with our rising confidence levels. The stimulus package probably helped even if by way of an economic placebo affect.

My home equity is still not going back up, and I've stopped looking at my 401(k), so I don't yet feel as wealthy as I once did. Houses still aren't moving quickly, and there's a glut of McMansions in the area where we live. But values aren't falling like they were, and it looks as if home values may have been corrected and are now stable. We're lucky in that our house is still worth more than what we paid for it almost 6 years ago.

Let's just hope neither of us gets sick.

Public and Private Coexist

The American University, mine and Mrs Vache Folle's alma mater, is doing very well in competition with the University of the District of Columbia and the University of Maryland, two nearby public options. TAU is a private entity that competes head to head with public entities for students and faculty, and I haven't heard anyone argue that public colleges will drive private colleges out of business.

FedEx and UPS don't seem to be much put out by the existence of the United States Postal Service.

Public and private hospitals coexist in many communities as do public and private golf courses and other recreational facilities.

Public housing exists right alongside private apartments.

The MTA runs trains and buses in competition with private cabs and limos.

Why couldn't a public health insurance option coexist with private health insurance? Is it because we don't want people to have too many choices?

Monday, August 17, 2009

The End of the Wire

We watched the last episode of The Wire last night. I feel a lot like the way I felt when I finished the last Patrick O'Brian novel. I'm devastated that it's over. The Wire was one of the best series ever. I don't usually care for cop shows, but that's because they're so incredibly unlike what it's like in real police departments and prosecutors' offices. The Wire, on the other hand, captured all the politics and bureaucracy and diverse agendas of the players through well developed characters who lived them.

I didn't catch The Wire when it first came out. I saw it on HBO on Demand when it became available. I learned about it from Barack Obama who cited it as a show he liked. Mr Obama, you are a man of taste, and I thank you for the recommendation.

I hear that the creator of The Wire has a new series to come out next year about New Orleans in the aftermath of Katrina. I will be watching.

HBO has it going on when it comes to original series.

Nephews Visit Again

Mrs Vache Folle's nephews visited again this weekend, this time without their paternal ancestors. It was fun. We had our traditional seafood feast on Friday evening with clams, jumbo shrimp on skewers, oysters and swordfish, all on the grill. The boys made salads from the garden. A good time was had by all.

On Saturday, I got to take the boys to Splashdown Beach, a small water park ten minutes away over in Wappingers. It was a perfect day, hot and sunny, for splashing around in the wave pool and floating on the lazy river. I avoided the scary water slides as beneath my dignity, but the kids did them all plus the arcade and the boardwalk games. That night we went to Tokaharu in Hopewell Junction and ate sushi and sashimi (two boats plus two orders of udon) until we were in pain.

On Sunday, their mother came to get them, and we all had salmon and garden salads for lunch.

Those kids can eat. Fortunately, they can also help with the cooking. Their mother is a chef, and she has taught them a lot. They're also very adventurous eaters.

I also put them to work on Friday with mowing and weed whacking and hunting for dog poop so they'd have some spending money at the water park.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Good Thing Bush Built those FEMA Camps

My conspecifics at the office told me over lunch that they had heard that a bunch of right wing militias were forming to overthrow the government. That's all we need.

This would be treason, right? Wouldn't the use of violence or threats of violence by non-state actors for political purposes constitute domestic terrorism? Those FEMA camps are going to come in real handy.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Mowing

A couple of years ago, I decided to do all my own mowing and weed whacking to get exercise and save money. Usually, mowing and weed whacking are pretty manageable since most of the summer is dry and the yard wants mowing only every other week or so. I have over an acre and a half in mowable area. Not so in 2009. It has rained almost every day, and the yard has wanted mowing twice a week at times. Given that the grass hs been wet much of the time or that it has been raining, the opportunities to mow have been restricted. I have had to become an obsessive mower in such dribs and drabs as nature has offered me. I have been beating the shit out of my mowers as they were not made for cutting wet grass. If I had a mowing service, though, I'd be broke since it runs about $75 a pop to cut the grass.

Nevertheless, I still like to mow. I always have. I know not why. Maybe it's a Zen thing. When I'm mowing, I'm just mowing and nothing else.

I've been following the rules of organic lawn care in that I don't care if there are weeds in the yard. I'm not interested in monoculture. I just want some greenish ground cover. Also, I cut the grass and weeds at about three inches and mulch the clippings back into the yard. See, I'm being organic, not lazy or anything. Anyway, it saves money and effort, and I'm not polluting the environment with herbicides or chemical fertilizers.

I started a compost heap. I'm pretty good at throwing crap on it but not so great at turning it. Hell, I'm going to turn it right now while I'm thinking about it. Or not.

Death Panels?

What the hell is up with the wingnuts and their "death panels"? Project much? They fear "death panels" because that's what they'd do if they had the power.

As for the provision in the health care bill about end of life services, I say BFT. Hospice has been a great comfort to some of my kin and acquaintances, and we could all use some help with dealing with the issues surrounding the end of our lives and the lives of our loved ones.

Monday, August 10, 2009

Return of IBIL

Idiot Brother in Law visited over the weekend with his kids and stepfather. The kids and stepfather were ok, but IBIL was insufferable. He's an unmitigated douchenozzle, even when sober(which to his credit he appears to have been for over two years now). He makes claims to being libertarian of the vulgar subspecies but he's actually an authoritarian. His primary outward expression is resentment and bitterness, but underneath it all is fear. I'd hate to be him and sober.

It's a wonder how his sister, born of the same parents and raised in the same household, could be so different. His kids don't manifest any of his deficiencies, either. At least not yet. His incredible laziness keeps him from expending much effort in transmitting them.

I wish there was some way to describe this person. Perhaps some examples of his utterances would suffice. "I want to teach my sons to kill and gut a deer." How many times has IBIL done either of these things? Never and never. "I prefer minor league baseball." How many minor league games had IBIL attended or listened to on the radio at the time of the utterance? None. "I'm a tax payer, not a tax parasite." This utterance was made when IBIL had a sinecure with the county government and when he paid zero federal taxes due to exemptions for his children.

Anyway, it was exhausting to be around such a toxic individual.

Wednesday, August 05, 2009

Globalization Killed the Dinosaurs

I caught an interesting program on one of the science channels about what killed the dinosaurs. Apparently, the asteroid that smashed into the earth at the end of the Cretaceous came at the tail end of on an already full on mass extinction. The theory is that continental drift brought the formerly separate continents together, that critters (especially large dinosaurs) migrated into new continents, that this messed with the ecosystems, and that contact between animals from different continents spread diseases to which the animals lacked immunity.

This sounds like a pretty good argument against unchecked globalization.

Wherein I Spin My Ineptitude as Virtue

My lack of handiness is abundantly manifest this week and the last.

The sump pump pretty much gave up after continuous operation for months on end, so I had to get some pump guys in to replace it. "Did you install this yourself? they asked. Were they kidding?

One of the wind gusts we've been having torqued the crap out of a big branch on the weeping willow tree out front. It's about 20 feet up, so I'd have to get pretty liquored up to get up on a ladder with a chain saw and take the branch off myself. I called an "arborist" instead, and he'll be by on Friday.

Tomorrow, the septic tank gets pumped. That's just routine maintenance as there's nothing wrong with the tank. I don't feel too bad about not having septic tank pumping know how and equipment.

Yesterday, I had an electrician over because I can't get the kitchen light to work. I was so embarrassed about it being such a small job that I thought up a few other things for the guy to do. Turns out the fixture is defective, so it wasn't my ignorance and ineptitude at work. I asked him to get me a new light as part of the job.

The Culligan man is also coming tomorrow to fix the leaking water purifier.

I engaged a handyman to do a bunch of jobs around the place, but he never came back after replacing the mailbox.

I reckon I'm doing my part for the economy by leaving stuff to the pros. It's the duty of every American who can afford it to hire as many tradesmen and service people as they can. We pay our neighbors to babysit our dogs and clean our house, and I would have a lawn guy if I didn't depend on mowing to get exercise.

Tuesday, August 04, 2009

Miracle Whip Will Not Tone it Down. I Mean, How Could It?


Hat tip to brand freak (http://www.brandfreak.com/2009/05/miracle-whip-will-not-just-sit-there-quietly-like-that-pathetic-mayo.html) for this image. Also, he has interesting commentary on this jaw dropping ad campaign.
Apparently, Miracle Whip is hip now, or that's the way it's being marketed. We ate Miracle Whip when I was a kid because it was cheaper than mayo and we were poor. Now I can afford mayo. End of story.
What's next? "This is not your father's SPAM!" or We're Velveeta! What are you looking at!?!"

Keep Brown Shirts Under Surveillance

When the Brown Shirts show up to disrupt town hall meetings (http://videocafe.crooksandliars.com/heather/rachel-maddow-gop-thugishness-town-halls-called), progressives shouldn't just take it on the chin. They should assign security personnel to take pictures of the Brown Shirts and record them and figure out who they are. Each Brown Shirt so identified could be assigned to a handler who would follow the individual's activities on the web, etc and post about them so it would be clear that the Brown Shirt Movement is orchestrated by right wing interest groups. The network of Brown Shirts and their leadership could then be exposed. This would help to nip things in the bud if the Brown Shirts decide to escalate matters into outright domestic terrorism, which they very well might.

The FBI ought to be doing this if it is going to be worthy of the name of secret police, but until they do progressives can take steps to protect themselves and the country from these crazies.

Monday, August 03, 2009

FAQs or Life's Too Short to Read This Blog

Why should anyone read this blog? I can't think of a good reason.

Why would anyone read this blog? They (1) are married to me and are monitoring my mental health; (2) take pity on me; (3) know I read their blog and feel obliged to check in; (4) realize I am awesome and that I will one day come forth with a nugget of wisdom that will change their lives; (5) secretly agree with me and want validation for our beliefs; (6) are government spies.

Why do you keep blogging when it is obvious that your readership hovers between zero and three? It's not about my readership. It's all about me. My blog is not "monetized", because it would not bring me money. My blog is a means of self expression that I don't have in the real world. Nobody cares about my opinions in the real world (except professional ones, if that). In the blogosphere, I get to put my views out there whether anybody reads them or not. It's therapeutic.

Why don't you comment more on other blogs that you read all the time? If you are a reader of this blog, you will know that I rarely have anything intelligent to say and that words of encouragement from me mean next to nothing.

Why don't you find a schtick and run with it? That smacks of effort.

Why don't you have more pictures? I don't know. Maybe it's the effort thing again.

Why don't you have a picture of yourself in your profile? I am so full of self loathing that I rarely permit my picture to be taken. When I do, I am disappointed that they look like me instead of my image of me as an attractive person.

Why are you so inconsistent in your opinions? Am I? Could I be evolving?

Since most of your posts are inane, why don't you make them shorter? Good point.

Have you ever held back on a blog post for fear of retribution? Yes. Crazy, huh?

Have you ever blogged drunk? Does now count?






Working Without Empathy

Sometimes, when you have enough information about a situation and a person, and if you are reasonably empathetic, you can usually get a pretty good idea about other people's motivations and the needs and concerns that inform their positions. That's how it works for me, at least. If, on the other hand, you are empathically challenged or have insufficient data on which to decide or just can't be bothered to find stuff out, there are some shortcuts.

1. Use defaults such as the one I employ: "Never attribute to evil anything that can be adequately explained by stupidity." This does not apply to GOP pundits or politicians, of course, or to anyone else who has repeatedly overriden the default. Or you might assume ignorance rather than deceitfulness until it becomes apparent that facts don't matter. These defaults work because people are, in fact, more likley to be stupid or ignorant or both than to be outright evil or deceitful. Also, if you are wrong, the error probably won't hurt you as mush as if you assumed evil and deceitfulness when in fact you were dealing with stupidity and ignorance. It's hard to back down from attributions of evil and deceitfulness. "I'm sorry I thought you were evil and deceitful when all along you were just stupid or ignorant."

2. If you are a social retard, do what all social retards do and project your own motives onto others. This won't help you figure anyone else out, but it will let the rest of us know where you're coming from.

3. Pretend that the other person is completely rational and assume that he or she desires all the consequences of their positions or ideas or actions. If Donald Rumsfeld went into Iraq with inadequate forces, it must have been because he intended for there to be security problems after the invasion. That way, the war could be extended indefinitely so as to bolster the administration's use of a war footing to justify all kinds of shit. There was never any intention to end the war and to leave Iraq secure. See what an interesting result you get? That's way more interesting than figuring that Rumsfeld was a big dummy. We all know he wasn't, but that's how he had to play it when folks started to figure out what was going on. What could he say? "I'm not incompetent; I'm evil!"

4. Pretend that the other person is a zombie without self awareness. This works for the religious right, birther types, and Rush Limbaugh/Sean Hannity/other wingnut viewers/listeners. There's really no point in trying to fathom their motives. Why does a sheep go ths way or that way? Ask the shepherd. Just go to their leaders' motives.

5. In the case of journalists (real ones, not FOX, in which case see #4), assume that you are dealing with someone really lazy with a cheap boss. Why is he reporting on this mindless drivel? Why is he regurgitating press releases? He's lazy, and he isn't supposed to spend time and money digging into stories.

These can be real time savers.

Cops Suck

I had an interesting conversation with some of my conspecifics the other day about police misconduct and my view that policing has become increasingly militaristic and hostile. To my surprise, my ally in the discussion was the right wing gun nut. On the other side were several white women 40-60 years of age who reckoned that there were a few bad cops here and there but all and all the police are our friends. I asked one of them "What's the difference between three policemen and three armed muggers?" "I don't know, what?" she replied. "I don't know, either" was the punchline. Ha, ha, ha. Pretty good for an extemporaneous joke, if I say so myself.

I don't reckon any of these ladies has ever had a run in with the police. One of them allowed as how she had seen policemen who were lazy or indifferent or cowardly in the face of a crime, but she had never experienced police oppression. I hope she doesn't get tased.

The best cops are the lazy and indifferent ones, as far as I am concerned. I refer to these as the "good" cops". The active ones are troublemakers who are most likely to get someone killed or maimed. I can't stand those guys.

There are very few cops who follow the model of community policing, who know their beat and the people who live there and who deter crime through their awareness and presence. These guys have lots of informants and helpers in the community because they are trusted. These guys can't get ahead in police departments because they don't put up the numbers. The kind of people recruited by police departments nowadays couldn't follow this model if they tried. They don't have the brainpower or people skills.

Thursday, July 30, 2009

Get a Clue, Whitey!

Apart from the small contribution of my sixth generation ancestress Polly Red Bird of the Cherokee, my genes come from Northern Europe. Moreover, I have grey eyes and a pallid complexion. I do not tan; I burn. In short, I am pretty much white. I might even qualify as a WASP if it weren't for all the Scots-Irish in my background.

Because I am white, I don't really ever have to think about race. If I were an ignorant wanker, I might even be tempted to declare that I live in a post-racial America. I'm not an ignorant wanker; therefore, I know better than to make such an assertion. I enjoy a lot of privileges by virtue of my race, and I am lucky enough to be aware of it on some level.

Many of my fellow whities are deluded into thinking that discrimination and racism are long behind us. They don't see it every day, mainly because their contact with other races is sporadic at best, so it must not exist. They themselves do not overtly discriminate, or so they believe, so where is all this discrimination of which black folks complain? Theythinks black folks protest too much. Theythinks wrong, methinks.

I have had the good fortune, if I may call it that, of observing segregation and overt racism first hand as a Son o' the South. I grew up in a working class family and was not sheltered from the realities of race relations. I was trained to be a racist, one of the patronizing and condescending sort, but a racist nonetheless. I have had to acknowledge that indoctrination and to apply reason to it every day of my life in order to live my conscious moral stand against racism. It gets easier every year, but the indoctrination is still there in my brain waiting to make me say or do something stupid and irrational.

For black folks, race is an aspect of reality that they have to negotiate carefully. They can't afford to be "color blind" as the clueless and the deceitful would have them be. Being color blind might get them killed. Black folks' recognition of the significance of race is not racism; it's the survival instinct at work. They didn't make the rules of racism; they just have to know what they are.

I urge my fellow whities to get a clue or, if they are among the deceitful racist bastards, to search their souls and repent. If it bothers you that you can't say "nigger", then you are one of the folks I'm talking to. If you reckon you live in a post-racial America, I'm talking to you. Who am I kidding? I'm talking to almost every white person.

More Genesis: Further Adventures of Supplanter

Supplanter works for his uncle for 20 years: 7 for Leah, 7 for Rachel, and 6 in his creative livestock breeding program. Supplanter's cousins/brothers-in-law start to get wise and to grumble, so Supplanter sneaks off with his wives, children, servants and stock. Ewe steals her old man's household idols and hides them in her camel pack.

Supplanter's uncle pursues him but is warned off in a dream by God. He searches Supplanter's stuff for his gods, but Ewe is sitting on them and claims to be menstruating, so nobody looks in her camel pack. In the end, Supplanter and his uncle set up a pillar and swear never to cross its spot to to do harm to one another.

Supplanter sens word to his brother He Finishes that he is coming home, and he is anxious when he learns that He Finishes is coming to meet him with 400 men. So he picks out some droves of livestock and sends them in stages to his brother as gifts in order to win favor with him. Then he sends on his family and entourage.

When Supplanter is alone, a man wrestles with him all night and dislocates the socket of his thigh. Still, Supplanter won't let the man go until he gets the man's blessing. The man, it turns out, is God Himself, and He renames Supplanter Strives With God. ( In honor of this event, the descendants of Strives With God eschew eating the sinew of the socket of the thigh.)

The meeting with He Finishes turns out well, as He Finishes welcomes and embraces Supplanter and his family. He Finishes returns home with his people, and Supplanter sojourns for a while in Shechem. The son of the prince of Shechem takes a fancy to one of Strives With God's daughters and rapes her. He begs for her to be given to him as his wife, but the sons of Strives With God, as deceitful as their old man, agree only on the condition that all the males of Shechem be circumcised, which they do. When they are all convalescing, two of Strives With Gods sons kill every male of Schechem, and the rest of the sons loot the city.

Now Strives With God is pissed at his sons for making him odious and subjecting the household to attacks from stronger neighbors. They've got to move.

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Obvious Observations

Some right wing nutjobs are trying to scare old people about health care reform by claiming that the health care reform bill provides for killing old people. It doesn't provide for that at all. Last I checked old folks get Medicare, and it pays for life extending medicines and procedures, even when they don't necessarily make any sense.

What does the Constitution mean when it requires the president to be a "natural born citizen" of the US? The first several presidents were born before the US even existed, so they weren't born citizens of the US. On the contrary, they were subjects of Great Britain. John McCain was born in Panama, and nobody gave that a second thought. George Romney was born in Mexico and was not disqualified to run for president. My opinion is that if you are entitled to US citizenship at birth you are a natural born citizen no matter where you are born. Who really cares anyway?

I reckon it's up to NFL teams whether to hire Michael Vick or not. I don't care one way or the other.

Pete Rose's banning from baseball has gone on long enough. He's a Hall of Famer in my book no matter what Bud Selig or the folks in Cooperstown say. My father looks almost exactly like Pete Rose. It's uncanny.


Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Just So Stories

The lads who were born to Supplanter, we discover later, bear the names of the tribes of the nation of Israel. The story of their births and their naming remind me of a Kipling "Just So" Story. You know, the ones that end with "and that's how the elephant got its trunk" and such like. And that's how the tribe of Exaltation got its name.

Whether these men were all sons of Supplanter or even existed at all is not particularly important. What signifies is that the story is later used to place the disparate tribes into a single superfamily. Just as patrilines are segments of clans and clans are segments of tribes, so the tribes are segments of a nation. All the groupings beyond the individual are predicated on the principle of patrilineal kinship. The tribes are probably related in some way, but the the accuracy of the genealogies is less important than the reliance on them as the predicate for a set of obligations and expectations associated with the kinship meme complex.

Now this concept of nation is quite different to what we nowadays think of as the modern nation-state. It is the family writ large. It is not necessarily a stable entity as loyalty to the progressively smaller segments and individual interests will tend to outweigh loyalty to the most distant and abstract of the groupings. Therefore, the concept of the nation must be reproduced continually and reinforced with myth. God is called upon to add the imprimatur of divine legitimacy to the idea.

Of course, some kindred groups are excluded from the nation, and the myths have to account for this. Otherwise, the progeny of the displaced first born sons would have to be included in the covenantal nation. I don't know why the mythmakers didn't just make their ancestors the first born. Perhaps it was deemed especially important for well being to leave the door open to exceptions to primogeniture or even to problematize the concept of primogeniture.

What we have in Genesis, I reckon, is propaganda to support the idea of a nation and conquest of a territory. Whether God promised anyone that the nation would rule the territory in question is beside the point. It came to pass that the territory was conquered and occupied by the putative descendants of Father of Multitudes. Hence, it was surely the will of God whether or not the nation knew what the will of God was in advance. The narrative, as it came to be written down, was for the purpose of reproducing the concept of the nation rather than offering what we would today consider history.

Sunday, July 26, 2009

Genesis 29 and 30

In Genesis 29, Supplanter gets conned by his uncle. It runs in the family, and Supplanter really should have seen it coming. After all, Supplanter was a masterful deceiver and con artist himself, a skill set he uses in chapter 30 against his uncle.

To Bind's brother had two daughters, Weary and Ewe. Weary had "weak eyes", but Ewe was beautiful. Supplanter offered to work for his uncle 7 years in exchange for the hand of Ewe. On the wedding night, the uncle substitutes Weary, and Supplanter awakes to find that he is married to Weary intead of Ewe. In exchange for the promise of another 7 years of service, the uncle permits Supplanter to marry Ewe about a week after the marriage to Weary.

Although Weary is "unloved", she is not completely ignored for she bears Supplanter four sons: Behold a Son, God Has Heard, Attached, and Praised. These names were messages from Weary to Supplanter, hints that God favored Weary by letting her bear sons while Ewe was barren.

In the face of this, Ewe resorts to giving her maid to Supplanter as a surrogate mother who begets sons He Judged and Wrestler. Not to be outdone, Weary gives her maid to Supplanter as an additional wife. Weary's maid begets sons Luck and Happy.

At some point Ewe grants Weary the right to lie with Supplanter in exchange for some mandrakes. This leads to another son Hireling. Weary's not through, though, and gives Supplanter yet another son Exaltation.

At long last God "remembers" Ewe and opens her womb so that she bears a son He Will Add.

After 11 sons and at least one daughter have been born, Supplanter expresses a desire to his uncle to return home. The uncle is reluctant because Supplanter has made him rich in livestock with his superior management skills. At last, they come to an agreement whereby Supplanter would be entitled to certain variants of the livestock. Meanwhile, since Supplanter is in still in charge of the livestock, he has some control over their breeding patterns. It is perhaps unsurprising that he arranges things so that the variants to which he is entitled become even more numerous and that Supplanter's flocks would be stronger than his uncle's. Supplanter's rudimentary knowledge of population genetics coupled with his unscrupulousness serve him well.

Genesis 28

In Genesis 28, He Laughs sends Supplanter off to the house of To Bind's brother to (a) take a wife from among his kinswomen, and (b) get away from He Finishes who is pissed about the theft of his blessing.

He Finishes realizes that his having married women from Canaan had displeased his father, so he aso took a wife from among the daughters of God Will Hear (Ishmael), He Laughs older half brother. I infer from this episode that He Laughs had never before admonished He Finishes about his choice of wives. Perhaps it was He Finishes's Hittite wives and the way they vexed the family that led to the family policy of intermarriage with close kin. Perhaps, He Laughs had written off He Finishes from early on and intended all along to make Supplanter his heir, in which case the marriages of He Finishes would not have mattered. In any event, the takeaway is that even a dutiful and loving son can be wronged by a father whose affections are elsewhere.

On the road to his uncle's place, Supplanter camps out, using a rock for a pillow. He dreams that there is a ladder to heaven with angels ascending and descending. In the dream, God appears at the top and extends to Supplanter the promises He had made to Father of Multitudes and He laughs: multitudes of descendants, this land will be yours, your seed will be a blessing, yadda yadda yadda. The text doesn't say that God appeared to Supplanter in a dream, only that Supplanter had a dream with God in it. Maybe it was God; maybe it was just a dream.

Supplanter wakes up and names the place House of God and makes a promise to God, to wit, If God will keep him on his journey and provide for all his material needs and bring him home safe, He will let God be is God, the stone that had been Supplanter's pillow would be God's House and Supplanter would give back a tenth of all that God would give him. No "thy will be done" tagline for Supplanter. It's do this for me God, and I'll do that. Supplanter seems to believe that he can influence God's choices with inducements. Who among us hasn't at some time or other prayed thusly as in "God, if you'll make it so I win the MegaMillions I'll give 10% of the winnings (after taxes) to the church and devote myself to good works for your glory".

Are we to infer from this story that this mode of prayer is the way to address God?

Friday, July 24, 2009

Arresting Prof Gates Was Stupid Even If It Wasn't Racial

Here's my two cents on the Henry Louis Gates arrest. It was stupid. Maybe it wasn't racial, but it was stupid. The policeman had plenty of options other than arresting the man. Cops are too damned quick to arrest people, often for no good reason other than to be douches. There was an insufficient basis for believing that a crime was being committed, and nobody was in any danger.

If I'm in my own home where I have every right to be and I end up arrested for being uppity to a cop, you can bet I'd be pretty pissed. I'd be justified. And my neighbors would back me up. Everyone would agree that the cop was stupid. It's incompetent policing, and it should be denounced.

Police treat civilians like enemenis in occupied territory, and this should not be tolerated.

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Feminization is Good

I sometimes hear people lament that men are becoming "feminized". Would that it were so. The process of feminization is the process of civilization. As the sensibilities of the elite classes, who are in a sense more feminine "gentle" folk less prone to direct personal violence, become adopted by the lower orders, civilization progresses. It's a good thing in my book for men to be more pacific in outlook and temperament and less likely to resolve issues by fighting.

Then again, my attitude toward the feminine is informed by my experience of the women in my family. They were farmers who could plow behind a mule with the best to them and who endured adversity with courage and determination. They were working women who embodied the best of womanhood. They weren't dainty,mind you, but they were ladies. They were caregivers and peacemakers and churchgoers who kept their families civilized. Those unfortunate families who lacked a woman's touch tended to wildness and disorder. The men just didn't have that civilizing something that women provided.

Nowadays, I find more and more men who have learned to be caregivers to their children and their communities, who have learned to manage conflict peacably, who have learned to love their neighbors. They've been feminized, and it looks good on them.

I reckon the whole course of cultural evolution could be characterized as the efforts of women to domesticate men.

Monday, July 20, 2009

Genesis 1-27: Do These Stories Matter?

Looking back on the first twenty seven chapters of Genesis, it occurs to me that these stories don't add much to our understanding of God and His agenda as they might actually exist. The God who appears to the patriarchs is very different to the God we imagine nowadays or even the God that shows up later in the Bible. The most we can glean from these stories is some insight into how one ancient nomadic tribe thought about God and how they sought to situate themselves in the cosmic narrative.

I'm not sure that I believe in the historical truth of even the most mundane of these stories, but I would concede that the progenitors of the Israelites included prosperous and reasonably successful warlords who wandered in and around Canaan and Egypt. Whether they had the particular adventures set down in these stories just doesn't matter. Asking people to believe them seems to me to be setting up a gratuitous stumbling block.

Me and Walter

Walter Cronkite, peace be unto him, was a hero of mine when I was a kid. We always watched Walter's broadcast and news specials. He had a nifty series about science after he retired. I loved how he would sign off whith "And that's the way it was...", and you knew that it really had been the way he had presented it. Nobody has ever even come close to Walter as a news anchor. I reckon nobody ever will.

I grew up in Appalachia and had a pretty thick brogue, and I knew that I would have to learn standard English to have any hope of getting out of my crappy hometown. Walter Cronkite was my model. I stood in front of a mirror for hours practicing saying things the way Walter Cronkite did. Before long, I had a pretty good mastery of standard English, and I was even able to bring my own rhythm to it rather than simply mimicking Walter and sounding like a bad Rich Little impersonation.

To this day, I can speak standard English like a native, and people are often surprised to learn that I'm a Southron. The only difficulties I have are when I'm a little drunk or tired and when I am called upon to read aloud. I don't know why reading aloud is so much harder in Standard than in South Midland. Anyway, thanks be to Walter Cronkite for helping me get the hell out of Dalton, GA.

Folle Family Stimulates Entertainment Industry

We went back to the city on Saturday and caught the other two plays in the Norman Conquests trilogy. It's even more hilarious when you see all the plays.

On Sunday we caught the new Harry Potter movie. It was two and a half hours long, and even then they tried to pack too much into it. It ended up making almost no sense. I feel as though I needed to have reread the book to get what was going on. Jim Broadbent played Professor Slughorn rather well. He plays everything well come to think of it.

Anyway, I kind of like getting out instead of spending all our free time puttering in the garden. Alas, the weeding and mucking have been neglected, so I'm sure the garden will make me pay for my inattentiveness.

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Genesis 26 and 27: Patriarchs as Grifters

When I read Genesis 26, it's deja vu all over again. This is a rehash of a story about Father of Multitudes, only ths time with He Laughs and To Bind in the lead roles. There's a famine, so He Laughs takes his entourage to Gerar, still ruled by the same king that Father of Multitudes made a pact with. God promises He Laughs that his descendants will be multitudes, that his seed will be a blessing, all on account of Father of Multitudes' obedience to God's law. Oh, and the land of the Philistines, including Gerar would belong to his successors.

Anyway, He Laughs pulls the old "She's my sister not my wife" trick just like his old man. The King of Gerar is on to him though and upbraids him for exposing people to sin because someone might have lain with To Bind. This is an interesting concept of sin, a kind of strict liablity in which intent plays no part. So far in these stories, screwing another man's wife is one of the few sins that have been enumerated. Don't kill people, unless God tells you to, and don't consume blood are the other two rules. I almost forgot genital mutilation. Following the law in those days wasn't too complicated.

He Laughs prospers and grows so strong that the King of Gerar asks him to leave, so he settles in the valley. He continued to have conflict with the locals over water rights, but he and the King of Gerar make a peace pact just as had been done with Father of Multitudes.

He Finishes marries a couple of Hittite women. Evidently, He Laughs and To Bind didn't like them.

Chapter 27 is a tale of unmitigated douchebaggery. He Laughs is old and blind and reckons the hand of death is nigh, so he sends He Finishes out to get him some game for stew after which he plans to give He Finishes his blessing. To Bind has Supplanter fetch kids so she can make a savory dish. She puts the kids' skins on Supplanter so that he can pass for the hirstute He Finishes when he goes in and steals the blessing. Supplanter holds himself out as He Finishes even when He Laughs expresses doubts (after all, the voice is Supplanter's). He even lies about how God provided the game when He Laughs questions him about he got it so quickly. Under false pretenses then, He Laughs bestows his blessing on Supplanter and allows as how he will be the master of his kin and that his brothers will serve him.

He Finishes then comes in with the game stew and asks for the blessing. Alas, it has already been bestowed on the deceiver and there's nothing for it. He Laughs gives He Finishes the crappiest blessing ever, to wit that he would live away for the fertility of the earth and the dew of heaven and would serve his brother. As a sop he gets some day to break his brother's yoke from his neck.
Understandably, He Finishes is in a fratricidal mood. To Bind tells Supplanter to go hide out in her brother's house in Haran until everything blows over.

I reckon He Laughs must have wanted to bless Supplanter all along, that he must have known that there was a subterfuge. Once again, the cadet screws over the first born, and it doesn't seem right to me at all. Either way, these patriarchs are not to be trusted. They're shameless liars and grifters, and I would not hold any of them out as a role model so far in the story.

I notice that God doesn't show up so much with He Laughs as he did with Father of Multitudes. He doesn't play an active role in the deceptions of Supplanter and there doesn't seem to be much of an effort to lend the imprimatur of divine approval to them.

The moral of the story is get the blessing up front before you go hunting for stew meat.

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Health Insurance

I'm in the market for health insurance. I'm self employed and Mrs Vache Folle is probably going to become self employed in the near future. COBRA from her job will cost more than a grand a month and will be short term only. What I'd like to get is something with low monthly premiums and a high deductible that would kick in if something catastrophic happens. We can handle routine office visits and prescriptions out of pocket and still come out ahead. It's the hospitalizations and scary diseases that we have to protect against, not the routine care.

But I'm finding it really hard to shop for individual insurance. Other insurance is easy to understand and compare and get quotes. Health insurance is a morass. Maybe the health care reform bill will help by making health insurance more transparent. It could happen.

I read the summary of the House bill, and it looks pretty good unless you're a health insurer. Apparently, one problem with the public option that many opponents have is that it is too good and will drive private insurers out of business. Seeing as how the public plan has to pay for itself with premiums just like the other plans and seeing as how private companies are said to be better than government agencies, I don't see what the private insurers have to worry about from the public option.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Genesis 24 and 25

In Genesis 24, Father of Multitudes extracts an oath from his steward to find a wife for He laughs from among Father of Multitudes' kinfolk. The steward takes ten camels to the city of Nahor and asks God for a sign, to wit, that a woman who offers to water his camels would be the one who would be the wife of He Laughs. Such a woman, To Bind, appears and fulfills the sign. What's more she's the grandniece of father of Multitudes, a young maiden still a virgin and comely. To Bind's family grants hospitality to the steward who tells him of his oath and the sign that To Bind had fulflled. He asks for To Bind to return with him to be He Laugh's wife. And that's what happened.

This chapter is interesting mainly for the narrative form. The steward repeats the entire part about the oath, the sign and his earlier conversation with To Bind, and the author writes them all out instead of simply referring back to them. Perhaps this was how the bards who transmitted the stories orally had done it, and ths would have been a way to reinforce significant parts of the story. No Canaanite wife for He Laughs, thank you very much, and none from Ur of the Chaldees. This marriage was made in heaven.

In Chapter 25, the widowed Father of Multitudes takes a third wife and begat children, but He laughs was the only heir. Father of Multitudes dies and is buried by Princess. Then follows genealogical remarks about the descendants of Ishmael, including twelve princes.

To Bind becomes pregnant with twins about whom God tells her "the older shall serve the younger" and that they shall be two nations. He Finishes comes out first, all red and hairy, and Supplanter follows with his hand on his older brother's heel. He Finishes becomes a hunter and the favorite of He laughs, whereas Supplanter was the beloved of To Bind.

One day He Finishes comes in from the field hungry and begs Supplanter for some red stew that Supplanter has made. Supplanter makes He Finishes sell him his birthright for the stew. He Finishes gets the nickname Red Stuff from this episode. I doubt that He Finishes thought Supplanter was serious, and Supplanter comes off pretty douchy in the story. Then again, I'm a firstborn.

Genesis 22 and 23: God Tests Father of Multitudes, and Princess Dies

Chapter 22 looks to me to be a completely different story about the Covenant or a sign that God was playing Father of Multitudes. Here God "tests" His chosen man by ordering him to take He Laughs to a mountain and kill him as a human sacrifice and then burn his body on an altar. Father of Multitudes takes his young son He Laughs to the mountain as God has instructed. He laughs asks his old man where the sacrificial animal is, and Father of Multitudes answers that God will provide the lamb. Then Father of Multitudes puts He laughs in a stack of wood and, with a faggot in one hand and a knife in the other, gets set to murder his son.

At the last second, the angel of the Lord calls out and stops Father of Multitudes. God, via the angel, says "for now I know that you fear God, since you have not withheld your son, your only son, from Me." God tells Father of Multitudes that "because you have done this thing", He is going to multiply Father of Multitude's descendants and make his seed a blessing to all nations. A ram is found conveniently nearby and slaughtered for the entertainment of God. The chapter finishes with some genealogical remarks about Father of Multitude's brother's family. (I would be surprised if anyone ever gave a sermon centered on verses 20-24. It could be funny what with names like Uz and Buz and Kemuel and Chesed and Hazo and Pildash and Jidlaph.)

Hadn't God already made the promise to Father of Multitudes? Was He about to renege on it, or is this just a case of a series of related stories having been jumbled together? Why wouldn't God know that Father of Multitudes feared Him? The God of Father of Multitudes does not appear to have developed omniscience yet. Also, He Laughs is referred to as Father of Multitudes' "only" son when we know that He Laughs has an older brother Ishmael.

I get the impression that human sacrifice was not unheard of in those days since Father of Multitudes doesn't seem shocked about it. How did he explain these actions to He Laughs, and how much therapy did He Laughs require after his father set out to kill him?

Chapter 23 is taken up with the death of Princess and arrangements for her burial.

Democrats Right to Appear to Seek Bipartisanship

I get the feeling that some folks in the liberal blogosphere are frustrated with President Obama and the democratic Congress. Why aren't they using their power to enact a sweeping progressive agenda? Why are they bothering with bipartisanship instead of ignoring the irrelevant GOP?

I reckon it's because the politicians know that despite everything the GOP is doing to render itself irrelevant and to become a regional coalition of various nutjob constituencies, it still got almost as many votes for the frightening McCain-Palin ticket as the Obama-Biden ticket got. Seriously, tens of millions of people voted for the GOP. Not just the nutjobs. Other dupes by the trainload went to the polls and pulled the lever for the party of evil and incompetence.

Obama was elected by some 20% of Americans. McCain got a few percentage points fewer. About 60% of Americans didn't vote either because they weren't allowed to or they didn't care to. That 60% contains a few principled non-voters, but it's mostly comprised of the indifferent, apathetic and misinformed, and the GOP might hit on some dumbass talking point that resonates with enough of them to get them off their asses and to the polls. It doesn't matter how odious the GOP really is, because these folks won't know about it.

Monday, July 13, 2009

Spam

I've had it up to here with spams about Acai berry, penis enlargement, replica watches, Viagra, and diplomas on-line. Seriously, does anyone ever respond to this stuff? If they do, let's kill them.

Our Weekend in Manhattan

Mrs Vache Folle and I spent the weekend in Manhattan. We stayed at the Hilton on 54th and 6th (I got a good rate because I agreed to sit through a time share pitch). We ate at Sinegual in midtown on Friday. It was great high end Mexican cuisine. I had a lobster enchilada and a couple of killer margaritas. And a chile relleno. Then we went to Campbell's apartment( some guy named Campbell used to have this kick ass apartment in Grand Central Station and now it's a bar). I had the gayest drink ever made.

On Saturday, we ate at a deli (pastrami hash and eggs for me) and visited the Folk Art Museum. This featured a visiting collection of wood carvings by Savannah barber Ulysses Davis. Also, there was a remarkable display of "kaleidoscope quilts" comprised of thousands of tiny slivers of fabric in intricate symmetrical patterns.

We also visited the Central Park zoo where my occasional contempt for parents of small children was validated. Note to said parents: If you have a stroller the size of a Buick, don't bring it inside the freaking penguin house or other small spaces full of people. Your kid can't see anything from the stroller anyway and you're going to have to take her/him/them out. Meanwhile, you are inconveniencing everyone else and creating a hazard. And if your child's intellectual capacity is not as well developed as the penguins', why are you bringing them to the penguin house in the first place? The zoo was exhausting, so we rode a pedal cab back to Central Park South.

After a nap, we ate at Maison, a so so Frenchie kind of place on 7th. Then we went to see Round and Round the Garden, one of the plays in The Norman Conquests trilogy. It was hilarious with great perfomances by Jessica Hynes, Amanda Root and the rest of the cast whom I had not heard of before. Celebrities Tyne Daily and the guy who plays Ben Lyons on Lost were in the audience. I stood behind "Ben" as he ordered a bourbon and ginger ale during intermission. I tried this drink later at the hotel so I could be more like my hero, guy who plays Ben.

The NAACP convention was starting at our hotel, so it was a hopping place. It's the 100th anniversary, and President Obama is slated to appear on Thursday.

The time share pitch was masterful and almost a joy to sit through. That's how good these guys were. I could tell they knew Mrs Vache Folle was the decisionmaker because everything was not too subtly pitched to her. We managed to get out without a time share.

Thursday, July 09, 2009

I'm not Threatened by Artificial Sperm

Amanda Marcotte at Pandagon links to an article about artificial sperm and discusses the comments at Salon of some men who reckon that this presages the end of men: http://pandagon.net/index.php/site/comments/were_not_all_out_to_get_you/

The reasoning goes that women don't really like men and sex and would, if they could, dispense with men altogether if they didn't need sperm. I suppose that artifical sperm or parthenogenesis would provide women with more options, but I don't see that these technologies would lead to the wholesale abandonment of men. I like to think of myself as more than a life support system for a penis. And I know that Mrs Vache Folle doesn't love me for my sperm. Hell, on the rare occasions when I deliver sperm, she can't wait to get rid of it.

Men have lots of other uses besides sperm production, storage and delivery. We do yardwork, for example. And some women genuinely like us. They would keep us around even if they didn't need our sperm, perhaps as pets.

The Bible is not a History Book or a Science Text

Are the stories in chapters 1-21 true? It depends on what you mean by "true". They are not true in the sense of history. History hadn't been invented yet when these stories were written down. They may be true in a mythological sense in that they seek to deal symbolically with the meaning of things. For the storytellers, everything came from God, was ordained by God, and their people were marked by God to be a blessing to the whole world. It's not important for any of these stories to have actually been lived out by real people. The significance of the stories lies in what they tell us about the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob or at least what the storytellers thought about Him.

Genesis 20 and 21: The Origin of the Deadbeat Dad

In chapter 20, Father of Multitudes pulls his trick of passing Princess off as his sister (it worked so well in Egypt). The King of Gerar, where Father of Multitudes is hanging out, takes Princess for his own. She must have been one hot ninety year old woman, let me tell you. I'm beginning to suspect that maybe princess was in her thirties or early forties and still looking good. After all, she hadn't entered menopause.

God tells the King of Gerar in a dream that Princess is Father of Multitude's wife and that he had better restore her to her husband. The king asks why Father of Multitudes would pull such a stunt. The answer is that Father of Multitudes was always afraid that someone would kill him on account of his hot wife. Besides, Princess was technically his half sister (he was her brother by another mother), so it wasn't really lying. This tells me that Father of Multitudes didn't put much stock in God's prediction/promise that he would have a good long life.

In chapter 21, Princess gives birth to He Laughs. She asks Father of Multitudes to get rid of Hagar and Ishmael, and God assures him that this is the right thing to do. Don't worry, God says, I will make of Ishmael a great nation. So Father of Multitudes sends Hagar and his oldest son into the wilderness with some bread and a skin of water. They are at the point of death when God's angel intercedes and shows her a well of water. Everything turns out great for Ishmael. He becomes a great archer and marries an Egyptian.

This story hits home for me, not just because it's another story of a breach of male promogeniture. I was abandoned by my father at about the same age as Ishmael, and my father had a son whom he loved and raised at about the same time in my life that He Laughs was born in Ishmael's life. I'm sure a lot of deadbeat dads take comfort in this story. I did okay without a dad. Just like Ishmael.

Anyway the rest of the chapter involves a covenant between Father of Multitudes and the King of Gerar that the King and his progeny will not be treated falsely on account of the kindness the King had shown. Also, they stipulated that Father of Multitudes had dug the well at Beersheba.

What I take from these stories is that Father of Multitudes was kind of a douche, but God chose him anyway.

Genesis 18 and 19: Sodom and Gomorrah Get Theirs

In chapter 18, God and two angels show up at Father of Multitude's place in human form, and Father of Multitudes feeds them calf, curds and milk, and bread cakes. God repeats the prediction that Princess will bear a son, and Princess laughs at the idea because she is too old. For me the money quote is in verse 18 where God declares that Father of Multitudes will become a populous nation and "in him all the nations of the earth will be blessed". Of course, Father of Multitudes is expected to bring up his children to do righteousness and justice.

God and his angels are on their way to Sodom and Gomorrah to check out rumours about the wickedness of the denizens of those cities and to destroy them if it turns out that they are as wicked as they have heard. Father of Multitudes pleads with God to spare the cities if 500 righteous people may be found in them as it would be unjust to kill the righteous and wicked alike. God agrees, and Father of Multitudes bargains Him down to ten righteous people. As it turns out, there weren't even five righteous people, not even infants or toddlers. Just Lot, his wife and their two daughters, so they were six righteous persons short.

In chapter 19, the two angels arrive at Sodom where Lot meets them and invites them to stay in his house. Presumably God is elsewhere conducting His investigation. Then the Sodomite men show up.

SODOMITES: "Hey, Lot, send out those guys so we can sodomize 'em. We're Sodomites, and that's how we roll."

LOT: "That's wicked. Take my virgin daughters instead and have your way with them. These men are my guests and under my protection."

SODOMITES: "That damned foreigner! Who is he to judge the matter? Let's sodomize him, too."

We'll encounter a similar story later on in the Bible, where women are offered up as substitutes for male guests for gang rape.

The angels rescue Lot and warn him to flee with his family. His prospective sons-in-law refuse to go because they think he's kidding, so just the four of them escape. Mrs Lot turns around to look at the hail of fire and brimstone falling on the cities and turns into a pillar of salt. It's unclear whether this phenomenon was a side effect of the rain of fire or punishment for failing to heed the warning not to look back. I prefer to think it was the former.

Lot and his daughters end up living in a cave. The daughters get him drunk, have sex with him, conceive and bear sons Moab and Ammon, the putative progenitors of the Moabites and Ammonites. I don't know if this was supposed to be an insult to those ethnicities.

Here's how I figure this part of the story came about. The cities of the Jordan Valley were destroyed in some spectacular cataclysmic event, and storytellers attributed it to punishment for wickedness. They put Father of Multitudes and his nephew into the story as a chance to show their concern for justice and their righteousness. There may have been a geologic formation that had the shape of a woman, and this was explained as Lot's unfortunate wife. Given the concept of God that was developing, it would have been very natural to attribute a catastophe to the hand of God. And since God was beginning to be understood as the "judge of the world", it was natural to assume that wickedness was the motivating factor. After all, God wouldn't let cities be destroyed for no reason, would he? If bad things happen to you, it must be because you deserve it.

Note also that God doesn't seem to have developed omniscience at this point since He has to investigate the outcry over the cities of the valley and doesn't know if there are ten righteous people. He also doesn't appear to know what He is going to do. I wonder if Melchizedek was destroyed along with the wicked.

Genesis 16 and 17 How We Got the Ishmaelites and Genital Mutilation

What's the point of Genesis 16? Exalted Father's (Abram's) wife talks him into marrying her handmaiden Hagar. Hagar begets a son, Ishmael, and the angel of the Lord appears to her and promises that her descendants would be multiplied so that they could not be counted. Ishmael, it was predicted, would be a "wild donkey of a man" and against everyone. Ishmael, as we learn later, doesn't figure in the story that is unfolding, so why even bring him up? I reckon this is another instance of having to explain why a cadet branch of a family ends up with the inheritance. As a first born son, I'm not too keen on this theme.

In chapter 17, God changes Exalted Father's name to Father of Multitudes (Abraham) and his wife's name to Princess (Sarah). God tells Father of Multitudes that Princess, who is 90 years old, will bear a son. Father of Multitudes falls down laughing when he hears God say this, and God doesn't smite him or anything. Instead He directs that the son who Princess will bear shall be called He Laughs (Isaac). He Laughs is going to sire twelve princes, says God, and God is going to be the God of Father of Multitudes and his descendants forever, at least the ones from He Laughs. There's a catch, though. Every male has to be circumcised. The author doesn't tell us how this went over with the entourage, but every male in Father of Multitude's household had his genitals mutilated that very day. It's not entirely clear, but Father of Multitudes may have performed the procedures himself.

Whether the conversations with God took place we cannot know, but the descendants of Father of Multitudes did, as the story goes, cut off their foreskins and believed that it was a sign of the covenant. And He Laughs did, as the story goes, beget twelve grandsons who were the putative progenitors of the tribes. It's a nice touch to the story for Father of Multitudes to know how well things were going to work out for him and his descendants, but it isn't really necessary to believe it for the story to have value. As the story goes, all these things came to pass whether or not Father of Multitudes knew that they would and whether or not Father of Multitudes was even an actual historic figure.

These stories are especially interesting because God appears to people all the time and talks to them. Later, God is conceived of as being too awesome for anyone to be in His presence. In the early days, though, God was thought of as immanent and readily accessible rather than transcendent and unimaginable.




Tuesday, July 07, 2009

Bible Study with Vache Folle: Lesson 5: Genesis 13-15

Genesis 13 is remarkable for what it tells us about Abram. Far from being a solitary individual, he was the chieftan of a rather extensive entourage (later we learn he had over 300 trained soldiers in is camp) with people, livestock, tents and personalty in abundance. When Abram came to town, you knew it. He needed a lot of space for his people and animals. Lot, his nephew, was also endowed with a large following, and it was decided that Abram and Lot needed to split up so as not to exceed the carrying capacity of the land. Lot went to the Jordan Valley and settled in Sodom. When Lot leaves, God reiterates His promise to Abram that his would be all the lands that he could see. Again, we don't have any way of knowing whether God actually made this promise to Abram or how he communicated it. It doesn't really matter.

In chapter 14, Abram and his trained men went to the rescue of Lot who had been taken prisoner in a war among various kingdoms. Abram defeated Chedorlaomer and brought back the people and their goods. The King of Sodom meets him and tells him to keep the goods but leave the people, but Abram declines to take anything except what his men and his allies have eaten. Melchizedek, priest of the God Most High makes an appearance.

In chapter 15, Abram begins to doubt the promise of God since he has no heirs of his body. But God tells him to put some sacrificial animals on an altar which, as a sign, manifest a smoking oven and a flaming torch between the pieces of dead animal. God qualifies His promise by pointing out that Abram's seed will be enslaved in a strange land for four centuries but would afterwards return to Canaan. This makes me think that God may not have been all that clear in His promise, that perhaps the message wasn't delivered personally. I mean, who would gainsay God Almighty if He is telling you something to your face? Who would need such a sign (which is far more equivocal than the promise)? If the promise was made, I reckon it was made through priests or in dreams or some such way. More likely, this was just made up after the fact to conform to what the authors thought had happened. As a literary device, it works. As a statement of historical fact, not so much.

Mrs Vache Folle's Boss is a Douchenozzle

Mrs Vache Folle's new job comes with the worst boss she has ever had to endure. Other than him, the job is pleasurable and rewarding, but he is such a monstrous douchenozzle that he sucks all the satisfaction out of the job.

First off, the guy is completely incompetent,a living embodiment of the Peter Principle. Secondly, his social skills are nonexistent. Thirdly, he's a martinet. I've never met him, but I've seen the effect on Mrs VF. Frankly, I'd like to tell him off.

I want Mrs VF to quit her job and find another one. I can't stand to see her so miserable. I know the economy's rough, but she's a stellar performer that any company would be lucky to have. Besides, maybe I can put in more hours on my end or even get an actual job as an employee somewhere.

Monday, July 06, 2009

No Check By Phone Payments to Collection Agencies

Here's some free advice. A kinswoman made the mistake of making a partial payment via "check by phone" to a collection agency. The agency failed to use the check number she provided and threatened to withdraw more money from her bank account even without her permission. She had to close her account and open a new one.

I've been trying to call to complain on her behalf, but the numbers don't work and the HQ claims its "system is down" every time I call to report a crime in one of their offices. I suspect that GC Services of Houston, the disreputable company in this case promotes threats of theft and downright theft.

The advice? Don't pay anything to a collection cvia "check by phone". You might as well give your account information to a Nigerian e-mail scam artist.

Bible Study with Vache Folle: Lesson 4: Genesis 12

Some interesting points about Genesis 1-11: (a) There's no devil, just a talking snake. (b) The evil in the world comes from God or from mankind because that's how it turns out humans had been made. That's why got regrets making mankind and decides to kill everyone but eight people. (c) Aside from a prohibition on eating blood and killing other people, there's no rules. Oh, and whatever you do, don't look upon your old man's nakedness.

It seems to me that these stories are a thin reed on which to predicate the narrative of the Fall of Man. Man didn't get thrown out of the garden because he was evil; he was thrown out because he became aware of good and evil. If mankind had continued to live in blissful ignorance, presumably we'd still be in the garden.

Chapter 12 of Genesis is where the OT really should start in my opinion. This is where a continuos narrative can be found to begin. Here's the meat:

Go forth from your country, and from your relatives and from your father's house, to the land which I will show you; and I will make you a great nation, and I will bless you, and make your name great; and so you shall be a blessing; and I will bless those who bless you, and the one who curses you I will curse. And in you all the families of the earth shall be blessed.

This is God's promise to Abram. He's talking about Canaan and the whole land from the river of Egypt to the Euphrates. Abram's descendants will be as numerous as the dust of the earth and occupy the promised land forever.

As an aside, Abram goes to Egypt because there's a famine and Egypt is the go to place in lean times. There he passes his wife off as his sister and she ends up with Pharoah until the truth comes out. Abram gets kicked out of Egypt.

How did the author of Genesis 12 know that God said these things to Abram? Someone told him so. This was doubtless part of an oral tradition for many years before it was written down. The author was not an eye witness to the event. Certainly, the descendants of Abram ultimately took possession of the promised land and, assuming that Arabs and Jews are descended from Abram, occupy the promised land and more to this very day. And there are lots of them, not yet as numerous as the dust of the earth but potentially as numerous with time. Since, as I believe, all that occurs is God's will, one might easily imagine God's announcement to Abram of what would come to pass. Was such an announcement made? God alone knows. Does it matter?

For all we know, God went around announcing His intentions in those days all over the place. Other progenitors may have been promised tracts of land and reproductive success but it didn't get written up. Anyone who didn't have reproductive success would not have left descendants to speculate on whether God had announced anything to their ancestors.

The key point for me is that the storytellers began to see the blessing of Abram as part of a greater narrative in which the children of Abram are to be a blessing to all the families of the earth. There's a plan unfolding. Now the OT is about to get interesting.

Friday, July 03, 2009

Flood

On Wednesday, it rained like hell. Our backyard had a river running through it because the pond could not contain all the water gushing off the mountain. Visibility was close to zero, and I had to drive 20 mph on the Taconic to get home.

Mrs Vache Folle and I went out to eat at Peza, our usual Wednesday night date, and by the time we got home the waters had subsided. I checked the damage and was delighted to find that our measures to prevent flood damage had almost all worked such that the only damage was the detritus that had washed up on the lawn in various places. A little raking and a little mulch replacing is all I need to do to recover from the storm. My measures by the pachysandra patch were in vain, but the pachysandras survived what I had believed was a pretty throrough scouring by the torrent from the mountain.

Anyway, I would rather have had a monstrous storm tomorrow evening. I hate fireworks.

Thursday, July 02, 2009

Bible Study with Vache Folle: Lesson 3: Genesis 9-11

Here's what God says to Noah and his family after the flood waters have receded. "Be fruitful and multiply." "You have dominion over every living thing." "Every living thing is appropriate for you to eat, but don't eat blood." "I promise never to kill everybody with a flood again and as a sign I give you the rainbow." "Don't kill each other."

Noah and his three boys are said to be the ancestors of all humanity. The youngest, Ham, sees his old man naked after Noah has been on a bender. This pisses Noah off so much that he curses Ham, more particulraly Ham's boy Canaan, and declares that Canaan will be servant to Shem and Japeth. I reckon this curse came in real handy when the Hebrews were exterminating the Canaanites later on. Man, how touchy was Noah? So somebody saw his shriveled up old frame. Big whoop.

Could Noah have been the male progenitor of all humanity? While it would have been possible, with luck, to reproduce exponentially, there is no evidence of this in archaeology or our genes. And there was no planetary flood, either. Maybe there was a spectacular local flood that inspired this and similar stories, but let's just admit that it's a myth. It's a slanderous myth at that. It makes God out to be a mass murderer and the author of evil in the world. Maybe that's how the authors saw God.

Chapter 10 gives some tidbits about the descendants of Shem, Ham and Japeth and states that the nations were divided up "every one according to his language". (Remember this when we get to the Tower of Babel.) These tidbits are unremarkable except for the exploits of Nimrod who was a mighty hunter and who built a lot of cities. This probably was meant to explain, as in a "Just So Story", the relationships of the various peoples known to the authors. Does it matter? No. Will anyone be edified spiritually by this information? Doubt it.

Chapter 11 contains the myth of the Tower of Babel and the warthful dispersion theory of linguistics. God does this because He wants to prevent humans from progressing. This seems to be a major concern of the God of the early Old Testament. Keep humans from the Tree of Life? Check. Prevent humans from attaining too much technical know how? Check. The rest of the chapter is concerned with getting from Shem to Abram and his immediate family.

Does it matter if any of this is true or not? Not a bit. Take it or leave it. It's just not believable. The first eleven chapters strike me as a hodge podge of legends thrown together for no particular reason than that folks knew them and would have expected their own history to fit into the familiar narrative. It's only when you get to Abram that the stories have any kind of narrative continuity, so I reckon you could just as well ignore the first eleven chapters and start with Genesis 12. You won't have missed anything, and you won't have started out straining credulity beyond the breaking point.

Wednesday, July 01, 2009

Domestic Imbalance

I have been taking a poll of married people and am finding that, just as scholars say, in households where both the husband and wife work full time, the wife takes on the lion's share of domestic and parental responsibilities. I attribute this in part to men's greater tolerance for squalor and their willingness to let their kids eat hot dogs for every meal and go to bed without taking care of personal hygiene. The men make a big to do about how much they do and tend to liken unloading the dishwasher to walking on the moon in terms of heroism.

I don't know whether I do my fair share or not. I doubt it.

Three Cheers for Al Franken

Al Franken is my hero. I will support him if he runs for president or for any office. Since I read Lies and the Lying Liars Who Tell Them, Rush Limbaugh is a Big Fat Idiot and Other Observations, and The Truth With Jokes I have prayed for a man like Al Franken to run for office. I hope he continues to use humor as a weapon, because he is devastating.