St George Blog

A Jobs Program the GOP Can Get Behind

2011-11-08T10:56:00.000-08:00

Americans need jobs, but the GOP is determined to keep the economy sluggish in an attempt to bolster its chances in the 2012 elections. A jobs program has to be totally irresistible in order to get past the GOP. I propose that the US create at least 1,000,000 jobs quickly by invading Iran.

Iran has over 600,000 active military forces and some 3 million combat ready paramilitary personnel, so it will take a sizeable force to conquer that country and to subdue it after the initial conquest. I reckon 1,000,000 troops would not be too many, and additional support personnel will also be needed. This means jobs aplenty, especially for young people.

The GOP loves land wars in Asia and hates caution, and they haven't shut up about the threat that Iran poses for nigh on a decade now. So I don't see how they could credibly oppose a war of conquest and subjugation in Iran. The Christianist right loves instability in the Middle East in the hope that it will trigger Armageddon, so those folks will be on board with the plan.

Aside from creating jobs in the short term, the O'Bama administration would benefit in a variety of other ways from a Persian War. Firstly, it is difficult to criticize the President during wartime, especially if you are a mindless nationalist as many of the GOP are. Secondly, O'Bama can do just about anything in the name of national security, including silencing dissent, and nobody in the opposition will be able to gainsay him without sounding like a defeatist or an America hater. Thirdly, O'Bama can credibly argue that America can't afford to experiment with a GOP administration in time of war since the GOP has demonstrated its incompetence in both governing and in war fighting.

It's time to mobilize America and get her people working again. Let's attack Iran without delay.

Somali and Norway

2011-07-25T16:31:00.000-07:00

I spent an idyllic week in Nantucket ignoring the news. Now that I'm back I have two observations. Firstly, I am glad I never got on the bandagon with the "Somalia is the proof that anarchy works" crowd.

Secondly, anti-Islamic wingnuts spend a lot of time arguing that all Muslims are somehow responsible for all Islamist terror because Islam is a religion of violence. Given that, isn't it fair to argue that anti-Islamic wingnuts are culpable for the acts of the anti-Islamic Norwegian nutbag who killed all those people because militant anti-Islamicism is a philosophy of hate?

Rob Bell

2011-07-12T08:30:00.000-07:00

This morning I started reading Rob Bell's "Love Wins". It is deceptively pithy, and it took me longer to read a few pages than I would have expected given the large type and simple writing style. An earlier work of Bell, "Velvet Elvis", was very influential in my spirtitual journey and very liberating.

I suspect that this book will advocate some form of universalism. I have universalist tendencies myself. Hell makes no sense to me at all. The whole concept of this fleeting life as a test with eternal ramifications makes even less sense to me. It causes me to question the very notion of an afterlife.

In one passage, Bell writes about how someone had once remarked that the great peacemaker Gandhi is in hell. I have been thinking about this all day. Some folks reckon that Gandhi is right there with Hitler in eternal torment. And maybe Hitler was introduced to the Four Spiritual Laws in his bunker in Berlin and prayed the formulaic prayer to receive Jesus as his "personal Lord and Savior" right before he died, in which case Hitler's in heaven! Does this make any sense at all?

I'm not saying that Gandhi deserves to be in heaven and Hitler deserves to be in hell. Nobody deserves anything. For me, it ain't about deserving. It's about what a loving God might be expected to do. It's about the boundaries, or lack thereof, of grace. Would a loving God create weak mortals, predestine them to act in certain ways and then torment them forever because they acted as they were ordained to act? I suppose that it's possible, but it boggles the mind and confuses the heart to contemplate it. I suppose that if I end up in hell, it might be for my own good or for the furtherance of some grand unfathomable purpose.

Maybe the suffering of the damned is meant to entertain and amuse the saved in heaven and to enhance their experience by serving as a contrast to the bliss which they enjoy. Think how lucky and grateful you would feel if you were spared the torments which were inflicted on people who had been no worse than you in life, maybe even better. Of course, if you really enjoyed the suffering all that much, you'd be kind of a douche.

Public Schools

2011-07-11T10:29:00.000-07:00

Is it morally wrong for me to enroll my newly acquired daughter in public school while at the same time opposing the coercive organization of education? After all, I have been paying school taxes out the wazoo for years now while reaping no benefit, and the alternative is to pay tuition at a private school in addition to school taxes. I'm going to do it anyway and rationalize it somehow, but I'd prefer to learn that I've still got some antigovernment cred even though I receive a government benefit.

Retiring the R-Word

2011-07-08T11:45:00.000-07:00

I've been finding out lately that I can't use the R-Word any more when talking about stupid people and stupid things. For the time being I've reverted to "feebleminded". I did the same thing when the word "illegitimate" and "illegitimacy" became problematic. I dusted off "bastard" and "bastardy".

Stop Saying the American People Aren't Stupid

2011-07-08T11:34:00.001-07:00

I frequently hear pundits of all stripes state "the American people aren't stupid." They don't really believe that, do they? A quarter of us are positively feebleminded. Half of us cluster around average intelligence where abstract thought and complex reasoning are just beyond our ken. The remainder of us have the theroetical capacity for abstraction and reasoning but lack the inputs to utilize this capacity. Clearly, the American people ARE stupid.

Look at the evidence: a GOP majority in the House; the existence of the WWE; the use of the word "intellectual" in connection with Jonah Goldberg; the election of GW Bush, twice.

Debt Ceiling

2011-07-01T11:46:00.000-07:00

If I were O'Bama, and Congress failed to raise the debt ceiling, I'd just keep paying the country's debts anyway on the basis of the 14th amendment. They could try to impeach me for all I'd care. Then again, I'm not like O'Bama.

I don't assume that my opponents have the interests of the country at heart, and I don't think that the problems of government can be fixed simply by manning it with good people. Every 4 years, the electorate is apt to put a complete douchenozzle in the White House, and then the structural deficiencies of the system become glaringly manifest. We need to restructure the system so that evil and incompetent administrations simply can't do that much harm. Also, I don't generally like to start negotiating from the point where I think me and my opponents should probably end up. I like to let my opponents negotiate for what they want after I put what I want on the table. That way, if my opponents are not negotiating in good faith, I won't have bargained against myself.

Bachmann Paradox

2011-06-30T13:07:00.000-07:00

Michelle Bachmann has a problem. A major part of her core constituency, the radical right wing evangelical branch, reckons that folks with vaginas are disqualified for leadership roles and should just shut their cake holes.

Bachmannspeak

2011-06-30T12:51:00.001-07:00

Here's my translation of some of Congresscritter Bachmann's ravings when she announced her fringe candidacy for President.

"I'm a peace through strength conservative." Translation: I aim to give the military industrial complex a blank check.

"I'm a fiscal conservative." Translation: I am insufficiently self aware to understand that this is completely inconsistent with that first thing I said.

"I'm a social conservative." Translation: I think I know better than everyone else how to live and I will use violence to impose my preferences upon society.

"I'm a Tea Party conservative." Translation: I am doubling down on my incoherence.

Victory

2011-06-24T11:09:00.000-07:00

I can hardly believe that victory has finally been achieved in Afghanistan and Iraq. I reckon that it would be cool to travel to Kabul or Baghdad and eat in the Olive Garden and have a drink at the Hard Rock Cafe in each downtown area. I wonder where our soldiers like to hang out when they are off duty now that the war is over. Probably wherever the women are. I imagine that we'll see a lot of war brides now that the troops can mingle with the populace in safety. They won't just be limited to the brothels and strip clubs in the immediate vicinity of the bases.

Optimism Bias

2011-06-22T12:42:00.001-07:00

I listened to an interview on PBS the other day of a scientist who has researched the phenomenon of "optimism bias". It turns out that humans tend to be optimistic and to imagine positive outcomes even in the face of overwhelming evidence to the contrary. That explains the invasion of Iraq. It also explains the many boneheaded business decisions that I have seen made over the years. I'm trained as a corporate lawyer to point out the possible downside to every "exciting new opportunity" and where appropriate to dampen the unwarranted enthusiasm of the business folks. I try not to get too cozy with the business team lest I catch the infection of optimism and overlook the potential problems that I'm paid to bring up. This is not usually difficult for me since most of the busness folks dislike me and will get me involved only when they are required to under operating procedures. They think I'm a downer with my pesky reasoning.

Optimism bias puts bread on my table. Long live optimism bias.

I'm not immune to it, of course. I imagine that my future will be happy and bright even though there are an infinite number of scenarios, mostly beyond my control, where my future is bleak and miserable or brief. How would I drag myself out of bed every day if I didn't imagine that I'd survive? Why would I bother with those Lotto tickets if I didn't see myself winning? Nobody would ever do anything if they imagined the worst all the time.

Hoops

2011-06-20T13:49:00.000-07:00

I fell in love with someone who lives on the other side of the imaginary dotted line of death known as our national border, and in order to enjoy the privilege of living with my loved one I am required by the government to jump through a series of hoops. Unlike anyone else, I am obliged to prove that I can afford a wife. Also, unlike anyone else, we are obliged to prove that we want to get married for legitimate federal government sanctioned reasons. For six months, our petition for a visa worked its way through Citizenship and Immigration Services and is now in the hands of the State Department where it will take some more months of processing.

Unlike other brides, mine has to prove to a bureaucrat that she knows me well enough to win the Newlywed Game in order to earn the right to live with me. Unlike other brides, she has to pass a physical and to prove that she's never been a troublemaker or a prostitute. We have to gather reams of documents and get them translated and notarized and stamped by all manner of officials.

What would be the downside of simply taking our word for it that we love each other and want to spend our lives together just like any other engaged couple?

Social Conservative

2011-06-16T12:32:00.000-07:00

What do these people have in common?

They're "Social Conservatives". When they were alive, they wanted to establish authoritarian governments to impose by force and violence their views as to how to live.

Missing Snakes, etc.

2011-06-14T12:24:00.000-07:00

My northern water snakes seem to have disappeared. Year after year, a family of water snakes has made its home in my pond. They were present in April after the thaw, but I have not seen them since. My hypothesis is that the pit bull (who went to live with my ex) used to keep their predators away and that they have been eaten. I also have been abandoned by my hummingbirds despite faithful maintenance of two nectar silos. The hummers showed up as usual in the first week of May but disappeared.

A Five Guys burger restaurant has opened in Fishkill. They make a damn good burger and fried taters, possibly the best I've ever had. Yesterday, I stopped by after picking up my cholesterol medication at the Walmart and ordered a double bacon cheese burger with the works.

I didn't watch the GOP debate. I figured it would just be a contest to establish who is the craziest and most authoritarian. The GOP will pick Pawlenty or Romney, whichever one can convince the most people that he has lost any vestiges of sanity.

I became addicted to George RR Martin sword and sorcery fiction after watching Game of Thrones on HBO. I don't know what to do until the next installment comes out in July. I've read a couple of decent novels to fill in the gaps: Everything is Illuminated, about an American who travels to Ukraine to find the woman who saved his grandparent from the holocaust, and The Anarchist, about the assassin of Wm McKinley. Usually, I hate sword and sorcery fiction. It always seems like the authors wrote down their D&D escapades, but I found Martin's work very enjoyable.

I enjoyed Pentecost/Music Sunday. I couldn't help wondering what the congregation would do if I stood up and started speaking in an unknown tongue. Presumably, I'd still be confined for another 24 hours or so.

Weinerville

2011-06-08T12:41:00.000-07:00

I have had it up to here with coverage of Anthony Weiner's "sexting scandal". I turn off the news if they even mention it. I know all that I need to know about it. It is way past time to move on. It's not as if Weiner had sponsored anti-sexting legislation or had been otherwise hypocritical, in which case the story would be a little fun. Wiener sexted and then lied about it, as anyone would have. What is so fracking amazing about that? Nothing. When he was first asked about it, he probably should have said "Jealous much?"

Righteousness and Temptation

2011-06-03T12:27:00.000-07:00

It's easy for me to point out how much more righteous I am than Tiger Woods or John Edwards or any other rich and powerful philanderer. I have never committed adultery. Shame on them and hooray for me.

On the other hand, I have never really been tempted in the same way that rich and powerful men are. No Waffle House waitress ever threw herself at me, and none is ever likely to.

Moreover, I don't think that my libido is as powerful as that of these philanderers. Illicit sex just smacks of too much effort as far as I am concerned.

Democratic Friends

2011-06-02T10:52:00.001-07:00

I don't criticize my Democratic friends as much as I do my Republican ones, primarily because they don't make as many bizarre assertions. They're pretty much up front about what they believe and what they want, and they tend to be too embarrassed to make intentionally spurious arguments.

One area where I do have a bone to pick with my Democratic friends involves some of the assumptions which they seem to make about humanity. One is that all people are equally intelligent and educable. This has serious policy ramifications. Given enough money and resources, any pupil can grow up to be, if not Stephen Hawking, then at least a Certified Public Accountant. Everybody should be able to get a college degree if they wish. The key to American prosperity is more technical training in order to tap into American ingenuity and permit every American to get a high tech job.

Where does this assumption come from? We all know from experience that some people are smarter than others and that intelligence and educability vary significantly from person to person. In recognizing this obvious fact, it is not necessary to make any statement about the hereditability of intelligence or the correlation of its distribution with other factors. We need to admit that a significant proportion of the population is unsuited for high tech work or higher education and that what is needed are good manufacturing jobs which permit persons with more limited intellecual endowments to earn a decent living. The current system simply treats such people as if they don't exist and exposes them to unwarranted stigmatization. My Democratic friends are left making unneeded apologies for poor people who have failed to respond to educational opportunities which are of no real use to them and who have simply been left behind in an economy that has shed its manufacturing foundation.

I'm not saying that all poor people are stupid, but I am saying that most stupid people are likely to end up poor in a society that doesn't take them into account. Even people of average intelligence are increasingly being left by the wayside as opportunities for them to get high wage jobs disappear.

Republican Friends Part 2

2011-06-01T11:42:00.000-07:00

What I meant to write about when I started in on my Republican friends was a conversation that I had with some of them about passenger rail. They were adamant that it should be totally private because any government involvement would result in inefficiency and bad service. Even subsidies would be a bad idea, according to them. Motoring, they argued, was ingrained in our culture as Americans and that is why Americans prefer motoring to riding by rail. Clearly, Americans have freely chosen motor carriage to rail carriage in the free market.

It did not occur to them that the system of roads on which Americans enjoy the motoring experience is owned by the government and maintained by the government and that motoring is, therefore, heavily subsidized. It never occurred to them that Americans' choices about transportation might be influenced by these subsidies. The "Government Turns Everything It Touches to Shit" mantra did not seem to apply to the road system and the infrastructure underlying motoring. That was entirely satisfactory and apparently such a part of the existential substrate that they were incapable of appreciating the inconsistency in criticizing subsidies to railways as a matter of principle while accepting massive subsidies for travel by personal motor vehicle. By the way, when you dig down below the surface even a little bit, the GTEITTS mantra does not seem to pertain to the military, either, or the police and fire departments or, indeed, to 90% of what the government does. It only applies to programs of which they disapprove.

I don't buy into the GTEITTS mantra. I'm against government involvement in things as a matter of principle because I prefer that things be organized in a manner that isn't predicated on coercion and the threat of violence. There is no reason in principle that government can't do things quite well and efficiently if capable people are in charge and resources are properly allocated. There's no reason to believe that governments can't run railroads. They do it all over the world. There's no reason to believe that large corporations will necessarily run them any better or in the public interest. If you accept the legitimacy of subsidies and partial public ownership of the motor carriage system, then you should also accept the legitimacy of subsidies and a degree of public ownership of railways. Then it comes down to arguing the basis for preferring motor carriage over rail or vice versa or the proper mix of motor carriage and rail or whatever informs priorities in transportation policy.

My Republican friends believe that they differ profoundly from my Democratic friends on the issue of the proper role of government. But they don't really. They pull out the GTEITTS mantra now and then, but they clearly don't mean it especially since they seem to support increasing the size and scope of government every chance that they get in connection with programs that they like. GTEITTS seems to me simply to be a way of avoiding coming up with a meaningful argument for or against a particular policy. It is not indicative of an underlying suspicion of authority or of a libertarian streak. It's just a gimmick. Unfortunately, my Republican friends don't seem to have the time to think about it enough to realize it, (that is, unless they are far more cynical than they appear).

Republican Friends

2011-06-01T11:14:00.000-07:00

I am actually friendly with some people who are willing to associate themselves with the Republican Party. They're nice decent people who are enjoyable to be around, so I don't really understand how they can align themselves with the forces of evil and ignorance. Of course, when I talk to them, it does not appear to me that they are racist or homophobic or warmongering or interested in bringing about an authoritarian dystopia. They favor lower taxes and less government control, but they are also suspicious of concentrated power in the hands of big corporations. It seems to me that they would be better off as centrist Democrats since they are not especially libertarian, but they seem to believe that Republicans stand for their ideals.

I suppose when I look at the GOP, I tend to see the coalition of nutjobs and neocons and to overlook the millions of normal people who are neither but who don't seem to have caught up with what the GOP has become. I wish that these Normals would take back their party. America needs a GOP that can actually govern, a GOP that doesn't go about looting and messing things up as soon as it gets power. I want to see a GOP that stands against authoritarianism, not a GOP that represents a more loathsome and sinister form of it.

I Believe in the Holy Catholic Church

2011-05-31T12:16:00.000-07:00

On Sunday, I confessed along with my brothers and sisters in church that I believed, among other things, in the "holy catholic church". Of course, being Protestant, I understood that this meant the universal church, not the Roman Catholic Church. I also understood it to mean the church, as comprised of the elect, and not the various manmade institutions referred to as "churches" or sometimes as "the church". I have never had a problem distinguishing between these two concepts and disregarding the temporal institutional form of the church when making this confession. I believe that in a spiritual sense the church is both holy and universal notwithstanding the disunity of organized Christianity.

An argument can be made that the apparent disunity of organized Christianity is a terrible witness to the world and that the appearance of disunity is confusing to seekers and a basis for claims of hypocrisy by critics. Accordingly, I agree that it is important to work toward ecumenical unity and harmony among Christian organizations.

On the other hand, I have often seen calls for unity used as a cudgel to enforce conformity to the narrowest and most confining point of view. The faction which seeks to impose its intolerant or restrictive point of view on the institution threatens schism with those who decline to adopt their point of view and then accuses them of creating disunity for failing to fall in line. For example, if I advocate an open and affirming stance toward homosexuality, then I am the one who causes disunity by refusing to go along with the homophobic faction's declaration of what is permitted belief. For them, I must confess that Jesus is Lord AND hate gay people. It is not enough to confess that Jesus is Lord. If I declare that the form of baptism is subject to a high degree of freedom, those who are otherwise inclined will decry my heresy and accuse me of creating disunity for failing to see the light as they see it. I must confess Jesus as Lord AND totally immerse adults only.

In my view, unity and conformity are two different things. If I confess Jesus as Lord, surely I have a sufficient amount of common ground with others who also confess Him as Lord to work together with them to advance the Kingdom without agreeing with them about every detail. If I love my brothers and sisters, surely I will be willing to accept a pretty wide range of points of view just as I accept a diversity of personalities and gifts. It's only when I claim to be some kind of an authority on spiritual matters and insistent on conformity that I become intolerant and divisive.

Spring Wildlife

2011-05-05T12:06:00.000-07:00

I had my first hummingbird sighting on Good Friday, a fat female presumably stopped for a rest on her way to her territory somewhere further north. Our resident bird usually shows up between 5 May and 9 May. I spotted a male this morning but I couldn't be 100% sure that it was our regular guy.

Since the weather turned nice, I have been jogging in the park along the Saw Mill River after work. If I wait until around dusk, I find that a lot of rabbits hang out by the trail. They lie in the grass real still until I run by them and then they jump out and startle the crap out of me.

Another sign of spring has been the appearance of the great blue heron and wood ducks in our pond. Since the pit bull went to live with his Mommy in Jersey, there's nobody to challenge the waterfowl. Maybe they'll hang out more. I wouldn't mind.

I accidentally stepped on Brad the northern water snake the other day, and we both fled from one another, me cursing and him doing the snake equivalent. I was barefoot at the time, and it gave me a start.

Warm weather birds are coming back, and I've even got some bugs.

Spring has sprung. BFT.

Wealth

2011-04-28T08:29:00.000-07:00

I was briefly interested in Ayn Rand. Then sophomore year ended, and I moved on. I was a total dweeb and unathletic, but I never had any delusions that I was secretly superior to others, and I never thought much of the whole notion that smart people or selfish people or rich people were somehow morally superior. This was especially true of wealth. I grew up in an environment where a lot of lowborn folks managed to get rich in the textile business, and it was easy to see that wealth did not do anything to improve any of them. Them as were virtuous when they were poor continued to be so, and them as were not did not appear to acquire any virtue along with their property. On the contrary, they simply became insufferable.

Old money seemed to be another matter. Some of the old wealthy families seemed to have spent their leisure time in acquiring learning and social graces and in developing a sense of obligation to the community. They didn't have the snobbery or arrogance of the newly rich, nor did they engage in ostentatious displays of their wealth. They sponsored art and beautification and educational opportunities. I barely knew their children since they all attended private schools in other towns, but I admired and respected the aristocratic adults with whom I came into contact. They did not have any illusion that they deserved or merited their status. They humbly acknowledged that it was inherited and an accident of birth.

In college, I encountered a lot of children of wealthy merchants, and almost all of them were total douchebags. They had no shame in announcing to all and sundry that they were superior creatures by virtue of their fathers' having bought them fine cars and giving them 4 figure monthly allowances. They seemed to believe that they deserved all this largesse and that those of us who did not have wealthy merchant parents were beneath them no matter how you sliced it. This was probably the natural byproduct of filial love which these merchants expressed mainly by showering their children with property and every indulgence. They did not want their children to experience the shame or deprivation that they had been made to feel before they became wealthy through hard work and good fortune. I did not accept their assessment of my self worth, and I confess that I was often impatient and contemptuous of the princes and princesses whom I encountered in school. I pitied the parents of these ingrates. The parents seemed like such nice people for the most part, but they had turned their children into monsters.

Stuff

2011-04-27T11:24:00.001-07:00

Of course, I mangled my Latin in the title of the previous post. Casus Belli, I meant to write. One of my own pet peeves as a language curmudgeon did not stop me from fracking that one up. When I was a young lawyer and still had secretaries to type for me, they would always change "cause of action" to "course of action" whenever it appeared in a document. It drove me crazy, but I could never get them to stop "helping" me in that way.

I heard O'Bama speak on the radio about "carnival barkers" today as he addressed the birther nonsense. What an apt expression for Donald Trump, although the man's name was not specifically mentioned. Them as subscribe to this birther hooey are either deluded dunderheads or racists for whom birtherism is an expression of their irrational hatred of O'Bama's partial blackness.

Why does the GOP want to keep the economy in the s****er? Lots of reasons. High unemployment weakens unions and worker solidarity. It puts workers more under the thumbs of the corporate interests behind the GOP. It makes people afraid, which in turn makes them stupid enough to vote for Republicans in 2012. The GOP is counting on the stupidity of the electorate and their forgetting who caused this economic mess and fiscal trouble in the first place. Also, for the evangelical Christofascist wing of the coalition, it strengthens families because people who are poor or insecure have to depend on their families simply to survive.

A part of this GOP strategy seems to me to revolve around keeping the housing market depressed. The GOP aims to get rid of federal entities that buy mortgages and replace them with private banks which will require bigger fees and downpayments and higher rates of interest. Also, they'll make it easier to get a kidney than to get a mortgage. This will really hurt an already moribund housing market and, worst of all, have an impact on me personally because I'm trying to sell my house. Frack the GOP! Frack the stupid, stupid mortgage bankers.

I'm sorry, was I raving? Forgive me. In better news, the hummingbirds are back as of Good Friday, and it's really, really spring at long last.

Causus belli

2011-04-26T11:01:00.000-07:00

Why did the nations have to pretend that they give a rat's patootie about civilian casualties when they decided to intervene in Libya? Who is the constituency which must be deluded in this manner? In my mind, it seems preposterous for the US to blubber about innocent civilians now when it so cavalierly dismissed this as "collateral damage" when it was doing the killing. Why don't the nations simply announce that they are seizing an opportunity to overthrow a player who annoys them? The dictator of Libya has been demonized for decades, so your average hooplehead will reckon it's a fine idea to get rid of him. And why not simply set a precedent that unmitigated douchebaggery of the sort that Libya's dictator has been known for is a sufficient rationale for war once you piss off enough other players? Maybe this would make the other annoying players try to play more nicely.

Personal Economics

2011-04-21T07:31:00.000-07:00

I have been stopping for gas almost every day as a hedge against rising prices. Already I pay more than $4.00 per gallon. My recently departed car pool companion would have been apoplectic. His pet peeve was gas prices, for which he entitrely blamed evil speculators. I don't know whom to blame. I'm pretty sure that the proprietor of the gas station isn't getting unjustly enriched and that he makes the same few cents a gallon as usual whatever the price may be. I'm thinking of buying a second, more fuel efficient car for commuting in fair weather (I used to have a Honda Civic for this purpose but this went with the ex in the divorce). My CRV gets reasonably good gas mileage but nothing close to what I need to make the 80 mile round trip cost effective. Right now, I'm spending about $15 every day to commute, and since my car pool partner died, this is all on me.

I was unaware that taxes weren't due until 18 April, so I mistakenly did my taxes on 14 April. I had expected to be royally hosed but was pleasantly surprised by how little I owed the feds and that I had actually overpaid the state. I didn't even take any specious deductions like declaring my pit bull as a business expense due to his services in securing my home office. This year I expect to be able to file as a married person and to have more exemptions as a parent, and I think that I will be able to set aside enough each quarter to cover my obligations assuming that my planned nuptials occur. There's a new commuter tax in New York that I don't really understand how to pay and report. All self employed people have to pony up to pay for the train system whether we use it or not.

My ex-wife and I let the listing on our former marital abode expire. Our real estate agent did absolutely nothing to sell the house except encourage us to lower the price every month until we would have to pay someone to take the place. Neither of us can afford to write any big checks at closing, so I reckon that I'll just live in the damned place with my new family until the housing market recovers a bit. We're not looking to make any money. We expect to take a loss of over $100,000 just so that we don't have to be entangled by continuing to own a house together, but we can't deal with being "underwater". Neither of us has any cash to throw away, and there isn't enough spite involved in the divorce to induce either of us to spend money for the sole purpose of never having to speak to one another again. The future second Mrs. Vache Folle is not keen on living in the house that I shared with the first Mrs. Vache Folle, or I would just buy my ex out and refinance.

I've been shopping for health insurance for when my new family arrives, and the prospects are unattractive. I'm probably going to have go with a policy with a huge deductible but which gets me the rates that the insurance company has negotiated with the health care providers. This will still cost me over $800 per month in premiums. If I were responsible, I'd also get life insurance and disability insurance, but I can't deal with all this right now.

My plan is to win the lottery, in which case all my economic woes will be resolved.

Nuclear Power

2011-04-11T13:08:00.000-07:00

I suppose I am not alone in thinking more than usual about the safety of nuclear power plants. Occasionally, I drive past a group of demonstrators holding up signs with messages calling for the closure of the nearby Indian Point power plant. Given the potential for a huge catastophe, I have often wondered why such a plant would be located so close to an important population center. Why not put such plants in remote areas where the consequences of rare catastrophic failures would result in fewer casualties and less disruption to the national economy? Why not put these plants in rural parts of Texas? The local folks would benefit from the addition of high paying jobs to their communities, and if the corporations which run the plants cut corners on safety (which they inevitably will) and permit catastrophic failures they'll be sheltered from liability by the corporatist state governments which they already more or less control. Moreover, the rest of the country won't miss the contaminated areas all that much, relatively few people will be harmed, and evacuation will be relatively easy.

Thinking about Religion

2011-04-08T11:04:00.000-07:00

I frequently drive past a few churches that feature attempts at clever or inspiring messages on their signs. The Episcopal Church now has a message that exhorts passers by to let their "hearts be broken by the things that break God's heart". I read this on the way to the dentist and meditated on it at length to distract myself from the discomfort of the cleaning I was undergoing. How am I supposed to know what breaks God's heart? In what metaphorical sense does God have a heart that can be broken? And if, as I am often told to console me in times of sorrow, heartbreaking events are manifestations of God's will, am I supposed to imagine that God's heart breaks even while His ineffable will is being carried out? I can't make sense of that sign. Over the past several months in church, our pastor has problematized "postmodernism" or at least the aspect of postmodernism that allows that various points of view can be seen as equally valid. It seems to bother our pastor that anyone (Oprah Winfrey has been called out a couple of times) might take issue with someone else for questioning "their truth". In my view, our religious views are not inconsistent with postmodernism, and I would think that pastors would embrace it. After all, modernism was the enemy of faith which is, in actuality, a premodern way of thinking. Postmodernism validates and legitimizes faith and faith based truth claims whereas modernism devalued it. Apparently, our pastor equates the certainty that the believer has in the truth of his own faith based truth claims with the kinds of allegedly objectively verifiable truth claims in which modernism gloried. I don't know what the point of all the preaching along these lines has been. We think we're right and that our beliefs are true. So what? We can't prove them to be true any more than anyone else with an entirely different set of irrational beliefs about metaphysical propositions. We'll come off like total jerks if we try. I had an interesting discussion the other day about the afterlife. My interlocutor and I both agreed that we were completely stymied about just how our immortal selves would occupy eternity. Nobody in all our religious indoctrination had ever given us a clue. What kinds of projects will we be able to undertake?

Farther Along

2011-04-06T10:46:00.000-07:00

All week I've been turning to the old hymn Farther Along. My dear friend died suddenly on Saturday, and he was a decent and loving man with three little children. He's gone, and the world is worse for it, but Newt Gingrich lives on. Countless other worthless douchebags continue to take up space and waste air and resources while Dan is lost to us. It makes no sense, and I am left only with the deeply unsatisfying idea that one day God's purposes will be revealed and will be understood. Or maybe not. Maybe I need to be content with the idea that God has a plan, that it involved the tragic and premature death of a great guy, and that I will never ever understand it. I don't suppose that I need to understand it. Maybe there is no divine plan at work here. Maybe it's simply the senseless tragedy that it seems to be and that part of being a sane human is reconciling ourselves to the fact that the universe is unfair. What is the difference among these three stances as a practical matter? None that I can see right now. They each involve resignation to some ineffable and irresistible forces. There's no sense in being angry at the universe or God or whatever one deems the author of these events.

Foreign Policy Double Standards

2011-03-30T08:43:00.000-07:00

Does it bother me that the US does one thing in Libya and something else inconsistent in similar situations in other countries? Not a bit. That's because I realize that the US is a sovereign state answerable to nobody except more powerful states. The US does what it does in Libya for a variety of reasons having everything to do with its perceived interests at the moment and in a particular geopolitical context and nothing at all to do with the stated purpose of protecting civilians from being killed. When it has suited the US to kill civilians, it has done so with gusto. Certainly, the US doesn't stand for the proposition that the murder of noncombatants is always something which warrants international interference. Had any nation sought to interfere with the US when it killed civilians, this would have been met with resistance. It has also stood idly by while millions of civilians were slaughtered on many occasions when it felt that it had nothing to gain from intervening. Perhaps if Libya maufactured teddy bears instead of producing oil, the US would be less inclined to meddle in the Civil War there. The humanitarian rationale for interference is just a rationale for public consumption.

Corporations

2011-03-30T08:14:00.000-07:00

I have encountered many folks who declare themselves libertarians who seem dismayed at my approval of regulation of corporations. How can I call myself a libertarian if I don't support unfettered corporate action? In my view, a corporation is a creature of the state. A collection of businessmen approaches the state and receives from it a license to do business with limited liability and with the ability to concentrate capital and power beyond what any ordinary subject of the state could hope to amass without the help and blessing of the state. Moreover, they seek to do this with almost no transparency. If you go to the state seeking these kinds of concessions and special privileges, I reckon that the state can impose any conditions on this that it pleases. And to the extent that these conditions accidentally protect me and other folks from predation and the abuse of power by the various syndicates, then I'm doubly behind them. Frankly, I'd just as soon have only the state (and its myriad annoying subdivisions) to deal with.

TV

2011-03-29T11:06:00.000-07:00

Reruns of Firefly can be seen on the Science Channel on Sunday evenings at 10:00. Occasionally, I suppose in an effort to justify the show's airing on an educational channel, Doctor Kaku comes on and makes some comment. Last Sunday, he talked about wormholes and exceeding light speed in "Serenity", Captain Reynold's ship on the show. I don't think "Serenity" has FTL capabilities, but I reckon it doesn't matter as long as more people get to see this outstanding series. Does the History Channel ever have any actual history any more? Every time I tune in, the show is about Nostradamus or space aliens or some such nonsense. I haven't watched enough to know for sure that I'm right, but I can't imagine that you can make a whole series about people with shitty jobs. Ice Road Truckers and Ax Men and Deadliest Catch sound like good premises for documentaries but not entire series. Just sayin'. I still haven't seen any Real Housewives or Kardashians, but I have actually watched an entire episode of Ru Paul's Drag Race. For me, The Biggest Loser is must see TV. Lately, the show has been way less about the interpersonal drama after hours and more about fitness. I've learned a lot about diet and exercise from this show. Also, I just love watching the trainers torture fat people. Tosh.0 and The Soup keep me abreast of popular culture. Since Keith Olbermann quit, I haven't really watched the news (except the occasional Last Word) other than The Daily Show. I listen to NPR and the BBC religiously. I've been watching Deadwood again. I like the Al Swearingen credo: I want to trade to advantage and come once a day. I don't hate the sitcom Modern Family. Otherwise, I've been watching movies and science and nature documentaries when I bother to watch TV.

Core Mission

2011-03-22T12:26:00.000-07:00

Lately I've heard some politicians on the TV talk about the "core mission" of the federal government. So far, I've heard its said that some program or other is not part of the core mission but so far I haven't heard anyone expound on what is the core mission of the United States government. Based on what the United States does with its money, I'd have to surmise that the core missions are two: to maintain a bloated military on the one hand and to maintain a population of old people in relative health and comfort on the other. Are these missions connected?

Libya

2011-03-21T11:32:00.000-07:00

I'm not sure what the military intervention in Libya means. Does it mean that the UN aims to intervene in all civil wars where there is a high risk of civilian casualties? Or just the ones where the member nations would like to see the civil war succeed? Or just the ones where lucrative oil contracts are up for grabs?

Purpose

2011-03-18T11:35:00.000-07:00

It would be a lot easier to evaluate whether state action was appropriate or effective if the state had a known purpose. If you assume that the state's actions are efficient and appropriate and then work back to the purpose, then you get a hodgepodge. Under that analysis, the purpose of the state appears to be (a) to perpetuate its own existence; (b) to provide employment for bureaucrats; (c) to maintain the existing power structure; and (d) a million other seemingly unrelated and conflicting purposes.

In my opinion, the state should devote itself to the overarching human project of taking control of all matter and energy in the entire universe and turning it to the benefit of mankind. Citizens should demand notning less than individual immortality, total leisure, and unlimited resources at their disposal. A primary sub-goal on the way to achieving these aims should be to get us off this planet before we destroy it or some cataclysm befalls it. Anything that doesn't promote the primary goal is a waste of time and energy and resources.

What Have I Been Up To?

2011-03-17T12:12:00.000-07:00

When the first Mrs Vache Folle left me, I had to start working a lot more hours to make up for losing her income. I ended up with the house payments. That cut into my blogging time and my time for keeping abreast of events. Then I began a frenzy of skirt chasing, and that took most of the rest of my time. Also, I needed time and space to get used to my new situation.

Last August, I met a lovely woman on line and began an intense correspondence. I fell head over heels in love. She is perfect for me in every way except one: she happens to live 7 time zones away in Ukraine. I flew to Ukraine and spent some pleasant weeks with the woman of my dreams in Yalta on the Black Sea. I ended up asking her to marry me and applying for a fiancee visa for her and her daughter. Since then we have corresponded or spoken daily, and we met again last month in Prague. We are now waiting for some federal bureaucrat to look at the visa application (it has been 13 weeks since I filed it). If we are lucky and our application is processed in the average time, we will be united in August and will get married. I will also have a teenaged stepchild.

That's what I've been up to. Work and travel and courtship.

I have opinions about stuff

2011-03-17T11:15:00.000-07:00

What with all that's gone wrong in Japan, I keep expecting Godzilla to make an appearance. Maybe he could help with that atomic power plant, but he'd probably just destroy more stuff.

The romantic in me would love to see America help the Libyan revolt succeed, but I am otherwise glad to see that America now has a government that is cautious and thoughtful about the use of military power. It is perhaps ironic that the foolhardy use of military power by an administration devoted to its unfettered use has effectively fettered the government for years to come and endangered national security far more than the threats which the Bush administration imagined.

Remember in 1992 when the presidential candidates of the Democratic Party were described as the Seven Dwarves? The crop of GOP contenders for 2012 makes the '92 Democratic hopefuls seem like titans in comparison. I predict that the GOP will nominate a former governor who is not obviously insane but that he will have to pander to the Tea Party crazies so much to get the nomination that he will scare the s**t out of the general electorate. Maybe the GOP should take a pass on 2012 and go ahead and nominate a total bats**t teabagger and get it out of their system. That way, none of their legitimate, non-crazy candidates will be tainted by the Tea Bag craze of the moment and will still be in good shape for 2016. Between now and then the GOP could work either to get the Tea Bag nuts under control or at least distance itself from their more loony elements.

Wouldn't it be nice if we Americans could follow in the footsteps of Czechoslovakia and break up amicably? I'm tired of having my government influenced by people in Oklahoma and Wyoming and Texas and those other backward places that would just as soon be ruled by the Christianist equivalent of the Taliban. I think I'd be better off if I lived in a smaller country comprised of the states of the Northeast from the Potomac up. That way, we could pursue our dream of being more European (a lot of us have actually been to Europe and like a lot of what we have seen) while the slack jawed yahoos in the other states could do whatever idiotic thing they wanted. We'd also get to keep more of our money instead of having it redistributed to the red states.

I hate reality TV, except for the Biggest Loser, the show where some sadistic personal trainers torture morbidly obese contestants. That's entertainment! I watch it while I'm on the elliptical at the gym. If I had nothing else to do but diet and exercise like the contestants on The Biggest Loser, I'd be thin. I used to like the nanny shows, but I got tired of the endless parade of stupid, lazy parents and became frightened for civilization.

Lamar Alexander

2011-03-16T08:38:00.000-07:00

On The Last Word the other day, I saw a clip of Lamar Alexander comparing concerns about nuclear power plant safety in the wake of the problems in Japan with concerns about automobiles in the wake of a car crash. The analogy might have been apt if a car crash could potentially kill hundreds of thousands of people and wreck the economy. I conclude that (a) Lamar Alexander is a moron; (b) Lamar Alexander's remarks were directed at morons; or (c) both of the foregoing.

Master of the Obvious

2011-03-16T08:17:00.000-07:00

I'm pretty sure that everyone with any sense at all has already said this a few times, but let me add my voice to the chorus of those who reckon that anyone who really cared about the deficit would have opposed extending the Bush tax cuts, at least with respect to the wealthiest taxpayers. Eliminating that part of the tax cuts would not have had a significant impact on the economy, and it would have helped to close the budget gap. If you pushed to extend the tax cuts for the wealthy, then you should just shut up now about the deficit. You are not credible. You are simply pandering to your imbecilic, misinformed base.

Bonds Between Teachers and Students

2011-03-14T12:14:00.001-07:00

Occasionally, I find myself agreeing with David Brooks. The other day on NPR, he was talking about his most recent book in which, apparently, he has discovered that emotions and our nature as a social animal matter. He talked about the need to apply this fact to policymaking. For example, he seemed to suggest that the emotional bonds among teachers and students are important considerations. I spoke aloud to my car radio, alternating between "hear, hear" and "d'uh".

In my own experience, whenever I felt that my teacher genuinely cared about me, even loved me, it made all the difference in the world. Like my peers, I was sensitive to indifference and hostility, and the benefit that I derived from school was vastly greater when I had teachers with whom I felt an emotional bond. These were the sort of teachers who continued to manifest an interest in me long after I had left their grade assignment.

If we accept the premise that these emotional bonds between teachers and students matter, I wonder why we insist for the most part in having teachers assigned to a single grade where they are limited (except for failures) to having students for a single academic year. Wouldn't it make more sense to have teachers follow their students for several years through three or four grade levels? That way, deeper bonds could develop, and teachers could really get to know their students and their families. In the current system, teachers barely get to know the children (and vice versa) before they lose them and start over with a batch of strangers. And children are confronted with the unknown every September. We're squandering the hugely important emotional factor.

Of course, it would be hellish to be stuck with a hostile or indifferent teacher for 3 or 4 years at a stretch or for a teacher to be saddled with a class of dolts. Presumably, a school district which adopted an approach which promoted bonding would also arrange to weed out teachers who didn't develop bonds with the kids. And maybe longitudinal exposure to a group of children would help indifferent teachers to form attachments with their pupils.

Radicalization of Muslims

2011-03-11T18:02:00.000-08:00

If the hearings hadn't been called by hypocritical douchebag Peter King, I might have accepted the premise that Congress ought to look into radicalization of American Muslims as a potential threat. But the hearings do not appear to have on the agenda the creation of an operational definition of "radicalization". How "radical" do you have to be before you are deemed to have been "radicalized"? What if you become radically committed to love and community service? Does that count? How meaningful is any of the testimony if the very topic has been left undefined?

Moreover, the hearings, despite their title, do not appear to be concerned with measuring the "extent" of the problem. A couple of anecdotes about nutty young Muslims does nothing to help us understand the extent of the problem, if it is one, or the potential for radicalization, whatever that might be.

Finally, if it is determined that some American Muslims are vulnerable to radicalization, what might a committee chaired by the likes of Peter King propose? Yellow armbands with crescents? Segregation of Muslims into camps or ghettos where we can keep an eye on them? Surely, a man who blatantly aims to smear and isolate an entire category of Americans by the way he conducts these hearings would be disinterested in efforts to fight memes with memes, the only way consistent with our values to confront the alleged threat. These hearings are about pandering to xenophobes.

Medicare

2011-03-10T11:44:00.001-08:00

I've been trying to figure out how Medicare makes any sense for the state. Why maintain a program to keep old people alive and healthy after they are no longer of any use to the state? As far as I can tell, the costs of doing this likely outweigh the taxes that old people contribute. Maybe having their parents and grandparents dependent upon the state in this manner makes younger people beholden to the state. Maybe this program is valuable for maintaining the illusion that the state exists for the benefit of its subjects instead of the other way around. These are all good reasons, up to a point, for such a program, but the potential skyrocketing costs associated with demographic changes should make us revisit it.

Perhaps the state should invest in a propaganda campaign designed to remind old people that they, too, are expected to sacrifice for the good of their country. It is their patriotic duty to die if they become ill and require expensive treatment.

Fat, Lazy Kids and Parents Who Hate America

2011-03-09T10:16:00.000-08:00

I have heard that the military is finding new recruits fatter and in worse shape than ever in history and that this has entailed expensive modifications to training. Parents of fat kids, why do you hate America? Why have you failed in your patriotic duty to produce young adults who are physically ready for combat? Shame on you.

It's too expensive to take your fat lazy kids away from you and raise them in government camps, so we should probably just have DoD take over scholastic physical education and school lunch programs. Then we can target those families which do not support the training regimen with increased surveillance and removal of the children as a last resort.

And another thing, parents. Why have so many of you failed to indoctrinate your children as to the desirability of military service? It is appalling that so many inducements must be offered to get your children to volunteer. We need for kids to see service as an honor and something that they would gladly do for free. We would be turning away volunteers if parents were doing their patriotic duty in promoting service.

Maybe we need to evaluate the tax deductions granted to parents and reserve these for parents who fulfill their patriotic obligations.

Jesse Lou Bagget 1997?-2010

2010-09-20T19:07:00.000-07:00

On Saturday, September 18, 2010 at approximately 2:20 pm EDST, Jesse Lou Bagget passed away from a lethal injection of anesthetic administered humanely at Hudson Highland Veterninary Hospital in Hopewell Junction, New York. Mr Bagget suffered from degenerative myelitis which had progressed to the point where he could no longer rise up on is own power and which caused him considerable suffering.

The circumstances of Mr Bagget's birth are shrouded in mystery. He first appeared to his ultimate adoptive family, the St Georges, as a fully adult dog in the summer of 1999 in Edith Welty Park in Yonkers, NY. Mr Bagget was a denizen of the park and the surrounding neighborhood in the Bryn Mawr section of Yonkers. He eluded dog catchers and would be adoptive families for over two years. He often joined neigborhood dogs and their families when they were on their walks in the park. He was particularly fond of Bob Geriak and his German shepherd Princess and would wait for them outside the Geriak apartment each morning.

In some parts of the neighborhood, Mr Bagget was known as Hobo. In others, he was Pal. He enjoyed the genersoity of many households who did not begrudge him table scraps. In the block where the St George family resided, he was known as Jesse. Mrs St George made a bed for Jesse on the porch for very cold nights and rainy weather, and it was to this bed that he retreated after being struck by a car and seriously injured. This led to his becoming the fourth dog in the St George household.

Mr Bagget was known for his dignity and good looks as well as his dog aggression and hatred of cats. He rose through the ranks as the St George dogs aged and passed away and assumed the position of alpha dog in 2003 on the passing of Sundance, the last of the beagles from the Washington, DC era. He governed Wm Jasper stone, a pit bull, who joined the family in 2003.

Mr Bagget is survived by WJ Stone, his underdog, and DA St George of Stormville, NY and Ellen St George of Jersey City, NJ.

Time to Get Over 9/11

2010-09-08T07:53:00.001-07:00

Every year as September 11th approaches, Americans ramp up the ritual of narcissistic self pity about the terrorist attack on that date in 2001. I hear cries of "9/11 changed everything!" and "Never forget!" as if 9/11 actually changed anything and as if there were any possibility that it would be forgotten. Yes, the attacks on September 11, 2001 were terrible, and it is a pity that so many died, but let's try to have a little perspective.

Londoners in World War II endured rocket attacks and death and destruction without wallowing in bathos. Half of Europe experienced devastating bombings, and today little is made of it. Japan was nuked, for crying out loud, and the Japanese do not define themselves by their victimization. The Old World endured those monsters Stalin, Hitler and Mao with tens of millions dead and tens of millions more in agony. And yet life goes on and moves forward in a way that does not permit the monsters of the past to define the future or the present. Even today, there are places where suffering and death occur on a scale which renders 9/11 insignificant. Indeed, Americans have inflicted far greater suffering and death in their reaction to 9/11 on victims who had nothing to do with 9/11 than occurred on 9/11.

Where's our stiff upper lip? Why do we display such an obsession with 9/11 and surrender to a stupid eliminationist reaction? Is it because Americans are terrified? If so, the terrorists have achieved their aims.

Do you hate and fear Muslims now when before 9/11 you didn't even know they existed or didn't even give them a second thought? Then the terrorists have succeeded with you.

Are you ready to shred the Constitution and surrender your liberties for the illusion of security? Then the terrorists have succeeded with you.

Do you buy into the irrational notion that Islamist extremists pose an existential threat? Then they have you right where they want you. You are afraid of shadows.

9/11 changed nothing for me. I am not afraid. You should not be, either. Take a good long look at the figures in the media and in politics who stoke your fears. They are doing the terrorists' work; their interests are aligned with those of the terrorists. They want you afraid, because when you afraid you are stupid. And when you are stupid, you will support them. Don't be afraid; don't be stupid; don't let 9/11 change anything.

Bermuda

2010-08-08T12:38:00.000-07:00

I just got home from a seven day cruise to Bermuda. My traveling companion was my 14 year old nephew. Actually, "companion" is not really an appropriate word, since I rarely saw him. He was off with the teen club and his new friends whenever he could. The NCL cruises are great for parents who don't want to see their kids much.

Basically, I was a single traveler on a cruise with no particular facilities or activities for adult singles, so I had to put some effort into enjoying myself. And enjoy myself I did. I spent a small fortune in the spa and racked up an epic bar bill. Gambling accounted for a few hundred bucks, and it was money well spent. I managed to find dance partners most of the time. On two evenings I had dates with women I met on the ship. Alas, there was no Love Boat happy ending where Gopher brings the star crossed lovers together.

I was delighted with the service and the friendliness of the crew. I met a lot of nice people who let me hang around with them. My only complaint would be that most of the passengers were of a lower social class than I am accustomed to hanging around with, so many of them were loud and obnoxious and whiny and constantly complaining about everything. I wanted to throw them overboard.

I don't think I'll take a cruise as a single person again unless it's explicitly a "Singles' Cruise".

Masochism

2010-07-29T05:27:00.001-07:00

I've been on the road a lot and keeping busy with divers activities and lessons and dating, and I have neglected to blog. I haven't had much of interest to relate besides dating horror stories and discovering that huckleberry infused vodka with lemonade is EVIL. I have done some soul searching, though, and think I have made a breakthrough that might be interesting to my reader.

My query to myself has been "what kind of fool stays in a relationship in which he is mistreated and disrespected"? A further line of inquiry is "and what kind of fool does it again and again"? A partial answer is that I believed the objects of my devotion when they suggested that I didn't deserve any better and that I couldn't do any better than them. But I am coming to realize that the problem is rooted in the nature of courting as I learned it and some deeper issues that I need to address.

Southern gentlemen press a kind of courtly, chivalric suit with unreserved and enthusiastic expressions of interest and flattery directed at women who are expected to appear to be indifferent. Or at least that's how it always seemed to me to be the way it was supposed to work. There was nothing more attractive to me than indifference (except perhaps outright hostility). Indifference was a sure sign of a lady's merit. She was not supposed to show any sign of interest until I had spent ages showering her with my devotion and practicing every charm I could muster, and then it would be most reluctantly bestowed.

So from youth, I always pursued females who did not like me and ignored those who did (assuming ad arguendo that such females existed). If they did like me, they would have to be unavailable in order to be attractive. In high school, I had some very close female friends as a result of this but very few dates. When I had girlfriends, I liked them more than they liked me, and I ignored the obvious "enthusiasm gaps" that should have foreshadowed the inevitable painful breakups.

I persisted in this throughout college and law school. I had lovers who were exceedingly selfish and inconsiderate of me. The higher maintenance, the better it must have seemed to me. I passed on many lovely young women (I was a catch at one time) who would have adored me in favor of cold and indifferent women who, in retrospect, cared nothing for me.

At first, my ex-wife was a break in the pattern for me. She pursued me relentlessly for months, and I was not attracted to her as a result. It was only when I got to know her and discovered that she was relatively unaffectionate and withholding that I realized that I had to have her. And the more she grew to despise me, the more I loved her. You can imagine that my love for her reached its zenith as she was walking out on me.

Tragic and stupid, huh? How do I break this pattern? I don't want to end up with another high maintenance, withholding and contemptuous lover, but I fear that I will be drawn to just such a woman like a moth to a flame. Perhaps the nature of on line dating will prevent me from hooking up with such women. After all, if they are indifferent to me, why would they consent to meet me or date me? I suppose, though, that there are women who enjoy being pursued and flattered by men whom they enjoy tormenting, and I am probably doomed to meet some of them. They'll be looking for men like me.

I'm hoping that awareness will help me see when my destructive pattern is emerging so I can make an escape. I really do want to find someone who will love me back. I think it would be better to die alone than to endure another lopsided relationship.

I need to develop a list of warning signs. Any ideas on what should be on that list would be welcomed.

Ballroom Dancing is Just like NASCAR!

2010-07-06T12:35:00.001-07:00

During dance lesson #4 on Saturday, I had the sudden realization that ballroom dancing is just like NASCAR, except that everybody wins. It all made sense. It's all about a series of left turns. I'm the driver; the lady is the car; and the object is to get around the dance floor without crashing into other dancers or the wall. OK, so it's only a little like NASCAR.

I tried the swing step again and almost got it. Crap, it's fast. And it smacks of effort. I need to get in better shape before I do too much swing dancing. I really like the foxtrot, rhumba and tango, and I can visualize myself driving a woman around the dance floor and maybe even carrying on a conversation.

I used to wonder why men who were dancing seemed preoccupied and inattentive to their partners. Now I know they're scouting the track and planning their moves to avoid collisions. You can't be peering into your partner's eyes too much or you'll get into a pile up!

I've got two more lessons next weekend.

I Know Enough About Ballroom Dancing to Get Someone Killed

2010-07-02T19:03:00.000-07:00

I had my third session of ballroom dancing lessons with Lyudmilla this evening. I have to say it was pretty gratifying because I didn't forget the previous lessons and was actually doing a pretty good foxtrot with directional changes and promenades, even a turn. Lyudmilla thinks I may eventually be able converse with my partner while I dance insteaad of counting in my head the whole time (slow, slow, quick, quick).

I had the basic rhumba down and started to work the hips a little. It must have been pretty sad because Lyudmilla quickly moved on to a cool riff on the dance, the name of which I didn't catch. It felt pretty fancy though, and I mastered it.

We started to take up swing dancing but I was such a retard that we didn't spend much time on it and moved on remedial tango where we danced around the room and did promenades . Lyudmilla promised to try swing again in the morning when I'm fresh. It won't matter. I'm always a spaz with a new step. I aim to learn it because it looks like fun and a way to dance to faster pop songs.

All in all, I am pretty satisfied with the progress I have made with 2 hours and 25 minutes of instruction.

The Dating Pool

2010-06-29T09:02:00.000-07:00

I estimate that there are 850,000 unmarried white women aged 32-52 within a 60 or so mile radius of my home. I'm ruling our married women as part of my Don't Be a Douchebag commitment. And I'm ruling out ethnicities other than white because I am physically attracted only to white women, and I want my next relationship to be physical to make up for the virtual sexlessness of the last 15 years of my loveless marriage.

Of the SWFs, I reckon 42,500 are lesbians, leaving 807,500 in the pool. I'm going to want to date someone from the right side of the bell curve (although exceptional hotness may be substituted for smartness up to a point), so the pool of potential partners is reduced to 201,880 women.

Then I have to figure in my subjective preferences. I have a type (Catherine Zeta Jones, Tanya Memme, Nigella Lawson, but a woman doesn't necessarily have to be a curvy brunette to be attractive to me. Hell, I was married to a scrawny blonde woman for 26 years. Based on a very unscientific survey consisiting of my keeping loose track of the times I have thought to myself "I'd tap that" compared to the total number of women who come into my field of vision, I figure that I could be attracted to no more than 20% of women. I'm not saying 80% of women are unattractive, just that they don't do anything for me. This gets me down to 40,376 women whom I would consider dating.

Of these demographically and subjectively qualified potential partners, I reckon that about half of them will have dealbreaking personality or character flaws. They may have voted for McCain/Palin, for one example. Or their kids could be such unbearable shits that I'd have to question their mother's judgment as a human being for letting them get that way. Now I'm down to 20,188 women who might be acceptable to me.

Of these acceptable women, given that they are intelligent and attractive, at least half of them will be in committed relationships and therefore unavailable. That leaves 10,094 ladies.

By far the largest winnower of remaining potential mates will be whether they will want to have anything to do with me. Will I meet their criteria? I'm guessing that at least half, especially on the younger end of my acceptable age range, will not be able to get past the fact that I'm 52 years old. That leaves me with 5,047 ladies. I'm not a bad looking guy, and I won't always have the paunch I'm sporting now, but I figure at least half of the remaining ladies will not be attracted to me in the least for one reason or another. I'm not their type; they like long hair or beards; whatever. They'll take one look at me and say "hell no". So, I'm down to 2,523.5. Half of these ladies just plain won't like my personality after talking to me for two minutes. Now I'm down to 1,261.75 potential mates.

I will encounter only a small fraction of these remaining ladies. They'll be on an on line dating site, or they'll be members of my church, or a mutual acquaintance will introduce us, or I'll pick them up in some singles venue. Most of the potential mates will never even know I exist. I'll probably encounter no more than 50 women in the next six months.

Maybe I should look into those Russian women who are so keen to meet me.

Still Working on Scripts

2010-06-21T13:53:00.000-07:00

Another script that keeps coming up is "You're lazy!"

My defense? No contest. I am lazy. I know it. I really like limin' and doing nothing.

I'm not sure there's anything wrong with that as long as I get my work done.

More Scripts

2010-06-20T12:16:00.000-07:00

Another script that runs in my head is "You're an ingrate!"

My answer these days? "No, I am a person who happens to have been ungrateful at times." I'm not immutably ungrateful by nature. If I were, would I even be aware of my ingratitude or capable of the gratitude I feel right now and which grows stronger every day?

I have not always been as grateful as I ought to have been, indeed as I would have been if I knew then what I knew now. In many cases, there is time to make amends and to express gratitude belatedly. In other cases, I can pledge to pay forward what I received, and I can take comfort in knowing that in most cases the gifts I received were freely given with no expectation of thanks.

There are other scripts to which I may make analogous retorts. I am NOT inconsiderate; I just haven't always shown the consideration that I ought to have done. I am NOT selfish; I just happen to have failed to seize on all the opportunities I have had to be generous. I don't need to internalize every misstep and failure as a character flaw. I can confess my faults and move on knowing that I am capable of improvement.

In the past, I always failed to distinguish between what I had done or failed to do and who I am. Then the scripts had me. If I denied being an ingrate, a bill of particulars consisting of a series of instances of ingratitude could be brought against me. If I denied being inconsiderate, then here would come the indictments in the form of every little instance of inconsideration. And so on with every human failing. I was not just a sinner; I was sin itself.

I'm not claiming that I have conquered the scripts, not by a long shot. But recognizing them for what they are should be a big help to me in practicing self forgiveness and being open to self improvement.

It Ain't About Deservin'

2010-06-19T11:03:00.000-07:00

In my solitude of late, I have been able to identify a number of the scripts that run in my mind and unconsciously affect my behavior and mood. The most persistent of these is "I don't deserve to be loved/I'm not worthy of love" or some variation on that theme.

I'm confronting the script with a big fat "so what!" Of course, I don't "deserve" to be loved and am not "worthy" of love. Nobody is. Love is not an entitlement. It is freely given, an act of grace which cannot be earned or demanded. It wouldn't really be love if you could cash in your chips in exchange for it.

My very existence is testament to the love that God has for me. He so arranged the universe that I would come to be in it and live in it. What an amazing gift. And He sent Jesus and claimed me as His own, all before I was even born. There's no issue of deserts or worthiness with God.

The same goes for people. I don't have claims on their love. Nevertheless, I find it freely given and coming from unexpected quarters.

The script can run all it wants but its power over me is fading. It is true that I am unworthy and undeserving of love, but is also true that I am, in fact, beloved. This is a powerful and important realization for me.

Now my focus is turning away from wanting to be loved and more to wanting to love. The prayer of St Francis comes often into my thoughts and as part of my prayers. The salient portion in this case being:

O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;
to be understood as to understand;
to be loved as to love.

I Emote

2010-06-18T12:51:00.000-07:00

So I'm off sertraline which I've taken for 12 plus years (I took something else before that but don't remember what and Prozac before that). I've been on some kind of anti-anxiety, mood regulating medication for a couple of decades, and now I feel like Commander Data after his emotion chip was installed.

The anxiety has not returned so far. Sure, I get anxious, but it seems to be the normal response to normal anxiety provoking contexts, and it does not persist after the stimulus is gone. Also, excessive caffeine consumption has the expected results.

What I am having difficulty with is the intensity of the mostly positive emotions I am experiencing. I can't talk about the incredible outpouring of love and support that I have received without shedding tears. I get weepy over moving song lyrics or bathetic moments in movies or books. I cry over starving children and the victims of war in newscasts. I tear up when I feel gratitude. I weep tears of joy when I feel joy. WTF? Shouldn't I have some other mode of emotional expression in my arsenal?

On the other hand, I have been enjoying full on, unreserved laughter like I have not experienced in decades (sometimes, you guessed it, until tears run down my face). I feel love, hope, peace and joy like I have not felt them before.

I want this to wear off to the extent that I don't totally wear out my tear ducts, but I also want to keep on feeling deeply. If I could do it without the waterworks, I'd be better than OK. If I have to keeop the waterworks, I'd rather live with that than go back to numbness.

How do you humans cope with these emotions and control your physical responses?

My Crazy Day

2010-06-17T18:19:00.000-07:00

This was my "day off", so I tried to cram as many appointments in it as I could. First thing, I see a urologist who diagnoses me with "hypogonadism". I knew it! I had been fatigued, gaining weight, unable to increase weights at the gym, and lacking in the libido department. I got a prescription for a testosterone gel. Then labs to see why my earlier liver function test was abnormal. Then stuck in traffic while a downed power line was fixed. Then an allergy shot, Then a $20 sandwich to fo from Panera. WTF?

I made a quick stop at Blue Seal to get bird seed (Neat Feast, the birder's secret) and some woodpecker cakes. I hit the pharmacy to fill my new rx only to discover that my shitty insurance prefers a different brand and won't pay. So it's back to the urologist for a new scrip which I return to the drug store. Then home to check in on the dogs and activate my "Androgel Savings Card".

Then a massage. Ahhhhhhhh. Don't forget the liquor store since the former Mrs Vache Folle is coming over to pick up some of her stuff.

Then go to church and meet with a "Stephen Minister". I didn't expect this to be helpful but it was. I'm meeting him again next week. I was exhausted from weeping and dealing with issues I had been avoiding.

Then back to get my precious testosterone and some tomatoes for the salad I'm making for the former Mrs VF. She's gotta eat doesn't she? I finally decompress a bit and check my work e-mails. Deal with a crisis and then go for a "jog" (60% power walk).

Feed and medicate the dogs. Relax a moment. Former Mrs VF is effing here already? Make her a salad, pour her some wine. Pack her some cookware because her lover's ex took all his. Make her take the goddam frozen duck that I had bought for a special dinner for the weekend before she left.

Take her to the train (Jasper comes along for the ride) and try to explain to her how badly I felt about how I had acted when she dropped the bomb on me and why I had done so. Got weepy. Gave her the mini bottles bottles of wine I had bought her for her train ride. Helped her carry the bags up the platform and onto the train. Wished her a fond farewell.

Got back to her car, which we had taken and which she was leaving at the house and realized I did not have a key to it. Pit bull and wallet were inside. Convinced Mexican limo driver to risk reaching into window cracked for pit bull to unlock car and take pit bull and dumbass home.

Blogged about big day. Wished had kept some mini bottles of wine.

Dancing

2010-06-16T12:50:00.001-07:00

Where I grew up, a lot of folks reckoned that dancing was sinful and incited youth to lust. So nobody ever taught us how to dance. Sure, we had dances in high school. Homecoming, the Sweetheart Dance, the Junior-Senior Prom. But nobody actually knew how to dance. We'd just "freestyle", i.e. wiggle and hop around as the music moved us and like we saw in movies. Slow dancing was just hugging while standing up and shuffling around. There were just the three dances all year, and none of us ever got any better. I certainly didn't. Even Baptist weddings didn't involve dancing.

By the time I got to college, the disco era was in full gear. So we learned a couple of stupid moves involving swinging our partners around a little and emulating the dancers on Saturday Night Fever. The dance floors in the clubs were usually too packed for most people to do much in the way of moving around, so we usually just reverted to winging it like we did in high school.

Only by then I was considerably more confident, no longer being a total dateless loser, and I felt free to innovate in my dance moves. This consisted primarily of looking disinterested most of the time while barely moving or getting really creative. My creativity generally involved pantomiming in a highly stylized fashion some sort of activity, such as fly fishing. I'd cast an imaginary line and reel it in, reel it in. Sometimes, if the music moved me, I'd catch a fish. Other movements I would deploy included "starting the mower", "rowing the boat", and "calling the dog". Later on I moved up to "riding the pony" and "sailing the sunfish". Throughout my career as a very bad dancer, I could always fall back on the old familiar "pancake breakfast".

I was blissfully unaware that I was not an excellent dancer until my wife and I and another couple went to a swing dance at Glen Echo back in the mid 1980s and saw what real dancers looked like. My wife couldn't dance, either. I thought she was worse even than I was, although I never had the heart to mention it.

Last year or the year before, I signed us up for a group dance class at my gym. I missed the first class because of a business trip. At the second class, the instructors kept referring to me as a cautionary example for the other students. I was so humiliated I didn't want to go back, and Mrs Vache Folle didn't press the point. I think she was embarrassed to be the partner of the spaz.

Now I'm single again with a lot of free time of the evenings, and I've signed up for private dance lessons with Lyudmilla and Yevginniy. I don't have a partner, and I don't know that dancing with another non-dancer will help me much, so I decided not to go the group lesson route. I hope that I am teachable.

2000th Blog Post

2010-06-12T10:07:00.001-07:00

It's hard to believe that this is post number 2,000 on this blog.

The next 2,000 posts will find me in changed circumstances now that I'm single again and now that I am embarking on a whole new phase of my life. I am excited and optmistic about being a happier, more loving person now that my zombie marriage has been put down.

One thing I'm finding out about myself is that it can get pretty lonely. Don't get me wrong. I'm not the kind of person who has to be with other people all the time, but I do miss having someone to cook for and watch movies with.

I want to start dating again and take a chance on finding a friend and lover to share my life with. This time I aim to do it right and to be more demonstrative about my feelings and more sexually engaged. I'm still getting my sexual equipment repaired even though I have no immediate prospects of putting it to use.

I'm hoping friends will try to set me up and that I will meet women as I get out in the community more. I'm thinking of joining community theatre, taking yoga classes, dance lessons, getting a life.

I've also signed up for Match.com and Chemistry.com, the online dating services. So far I'm a real hit with Nigerian scam artists and women who look like they could be my mother. The scammers contact me and claim to like my profile and set up on line chats in which they are way too friendly and in which they reveal that they are currently in Nigeria/Ghana/Malaysia to buy stuff for their businesses. Of course, they are entrepreneurs. Their poor command of English and evasiveness give them away, and I have not been scammed out of any money. I did some research on line and discovered that the next step is to get your pathetic lonely ass hooked and then ask for you to deposit a money order for them and send them the cash. Fortunately for me, I am not that pathetic and desperate, and I'm not stupid, either.

I have exchanged some e-mails with some actual nice ladies who really exist and are looking for guys like me, and I have spoken on the phone to a couple of them. I have a "date" to call a woman on Monday. I've gotten some polite rejections based on geographical distance and my legal status (separated, not divorced). Mostly, my "winks" and e-mails just get ignored. It's been just a few days, so I'm still hopeful.

I think I'm a pretty good prospect. I'm smart, a professional, not bad looking (if you discount the belly fat I'm working on losing), and funny. I'm not especially nutty. I'm not controlling. I'm not even that picky. I'll date women with children, women my age, women who are not beauty queens, women who are flawed.

Maybe this will be fun. If it isn't, I'll just have to go the mail order bride route ;).

I Got Better

2010-06-10T07:40:00.000-07:00

Prayer, fasting, soul searching, letting myself feel and crying like a baby, receiving prayers and words of comfort from friends. All these things have helped me realize that I will get through this. I find that I'm not only getting through this thing, but I am growing and learning.

I was in a panic about being all alone in the world. I have enjoyed an outpouring of love and support from friends and from my church and even readers of this blog. I have been prayed about and comforted and loved, and I have been moved to tears by it. I'm not alone.

Getting this panic out of the way has helped me acknowledge that my marriage has been in a zombie state for a long time. Mrs Vache Folle had the strength and courage to pull the plug, and I admire her for it. I have come to accept and to affirm her decision, and I aim to do anything I can as a loving friend to help her in this transition. I love her enough to know that letting her go is the most loving thing I can do.

I'm learning about gratitude. I'm thankful for the good times we had together and for her lovingkindness and solicitude over the years even when things were rocky. I'm thankful for the friendship I expect we will have in the future. I'm thankful for my friends and loved ones, and I aim to be a better friend, return love more freely and openly and pay it forward whenever I can. I thank God for my life and for the plans He has for me, and I am optimistic about my prospects for happiness and a fuller life. I thank Mrs VF for having the courage to to move on.

I'm learning about fear, how being afraid all the time is sucking the life out of me. I don't even know what it is I'm afraid of; it's just the default setting of my emotions since I was a child. I'm definitely afraid to feel, and the profound feelings I have been experiencing lately have allowed me to see that my feelings aren't going to destroy me. In fact, suppressing them will kill me if I keep it up. When I was a boy, I lived in a household where fear, dread and anxiety were constants, and I wonder if I somehow got stuck.

Thanks to my blog readers who offered words of encouragement and the rest of you whom I know have prayed for me. I'm getting better, and I expect to end up a better man, a better friend and closer to God out of all this.

I am Bereft

2010-06-04T16:56:00.000-07:00

Despite promises to go to counseling and to work things out, Mrs Vache Folle left me this morning. She thought I would be gone, but my carpool companion was late. It was as if her feelings for me had totally switched off between breakfast and 9:00 am. Seriously, I am lower than whale shit as far as she is concerned, utterly undeserving of any consideration. Needless to say, it was a kick in the balls, and I have been on several crying jags since this morning. This is the first time I have felt seriously suicidal in my life. If I didn't think Mrs Vache Folle would gleefully cash the insurance check and spend it on her lover, I would have eaten a shotgun by now.

I feel as if I never knew the woman. She was always so decent.

I just want to disappear.

Wood

2010-06-03T07:42:00.001-07:00

Last year I was told that my testosterone level was low, but I didn't do anything about it. Now I have come to understand that low testosterone can lead to low energy, depression, weight gain, incomplete erections and problems with orgasm. I have all these issues in spades, and now I am trying to become sexually active again. Therefore, I am going to see a urologist. Perhaps he can tinker with my medications and give me hormone supplements so I can make love again without the frustration of marathon sessions with belated or no happy endings for me.

I changed my primary care physician and was advised by him that the sertraline I have been taking for ten years kills your sexual sensitivity. I am lowering my dose and weaning off it to see if I can come to full attention and cope with my anxiety neurosis.

My Memorial Day Weekend

2010-06-02T10:19:00.000-07:00

I arranged a weekend getaway for Mrs Vache Folle and myself in the hope that a change of scene might help us talk things out. We had a very nice time, but I don't know if it did any good in the marriage saving department. We'll see.

Meanwhile, I have to rave about our terrific experience in the Berkshires. Every aspect of the trip was wonderful, and I would like to publicize to the world (or at least to my three or four readers) how much we enjoyed the bed and breakfast, restaurants and other amenities in the area.

First off, let me state that I chose our B&B based on its very helpful and professionally designed website. The same went for the horseback riding stable and one of the restaurants where we dined. Being able to transact business and make inquiries by e-mail is important to me, and the businesses I chose had that capability.

We drove up the Taconic to Route 23 to Route 7 on Saturday morning. Although the day was overcast with intermittent rain, it was a lovely drive. We drove through Great Barrington and stopped for lunch in Stockbridge at a little bistro called Michaels. We shared a bleu cheese burger. The staff was attentive, and the sandwich was enjoyable. Stockbridge was quaint and picturesque as just you'd expect from a New England town.

It was too early to check into our B&B when we got to Lee, so we decided to take in some attractions. We were turned away from the Mount, Edith Wharton's mansion, because of a private event, so we made our way to the Hancock Shaker Village in Pittsfield instead. This is a well preserved example of a once thriving Shaker community with extensive gardens and buildings and lots of Shaker artifacts. Knowledgeable docents are positioned throughout the site. I bought a Shaker style straw hat which came in handy when the sun came out.

We then checked into The Applegate Bed & Breakfast in Lee. This is a 1920s Gatsbyesque structure situated on 6 acres of gardens and manicured lawns. We were booked into the carriage house in a well appointed suite with modern conveniences and antique charm. The television was hidden behind a wall painting. There was a very comfortable king sized bed, a kitchenette, a sitting area with a gas fireplace, and a huge bath with a walk in shower and oversized jacuzzi tub. I had arranged for wine and cheese in the room, and the innkeepers supplied brandy as a matter of course. The room was very comfortable, and I could imagine spending a great deal of time in it.

Wine and cheese are served in the parlor of the main house at 5:00, and this presented an opportunity to mingle with the other guests and share stories about our holidays and suggestions for sightseeing and dining. A delightful breakfast was served from 8:00-10:00 in the dining room. In back of the main house is a heated swimming pool which we enjoyed on a very hot and sunny Sunday. The innkeepers, Len and Gloria Friedman, and their manager, Pam, were hospitable and helpful in every way. We enjoyed our stay very much and will (if we don't get divorced) return.

On Sunday morning, we made our way up to the town of Lennox and the Aspinwall Equestrian Center. This riding stable abuts Kennedy Park, a square mile or so of bridle/hiking/biking/jogging/dog walking trails on the former site of a luxury hotel which burned down in the 1930s. Our guide, Dan, was a local man who was both amiable and capable. Based on a phone converation we had had some days earlier, he had selected a pair of horses, George aka Jumbo for me and Shadow for Mrs Vache Folle. He rode the lead horse Lucky and I followed on George with Mrs VF's taking up the rear on Shadow. George was an enormous beast, and I towered over my wife and her steed. Both our horses were well mannered except for trying to stop to eat all the time if we did not check them, and we had an enjoyable two hour ride through the park, up and down hills, and in the woods. I liked it so much that I booked another one hour ride for the next day.

The stable boasts a number of Icelandic horses which look like living versions of My Little Pony. All of the animals, even down to the Manx barn cats, appeared to be well looked after.

We dined Saturday at Chez Nous in downtown Lee. This was a very busy French restaurant. The service was excellent and the food was remarkable. The atmosphere was a little crowded and bright for my liking, but I would definitely eat there again. Mrs VF had pan seared scallops with a heavenly sauce, and, unheard of for her, she cleaned her plate. I had a very nice locally grown Berkshire pork loin with truffle mashed potatoes and a bowl of seafood soup.

On Sunday we dined at Perigee, a continental restaurant in South Lee on the advice of some of our fellow guests at Applegate. Mrs VF had scallops again, this time with shrimp with risoto and a delicious cilantro pesto. I had the jamabalaya and would place my meal in the top 100 meals in my lifetime. The lighting was more romantic at Perigee than at Chez Nous, although it was just as busy.

For lunch on Monday, we ate fish and chips and fried oysters at Salmon Run in Lee. It was quite nice.

We finally toured the Mount on Monday on our way to the stable for our second ride. The house and grounds have been very nicely renovated, and the tour affords an opportunity to learn a great deal about Edith Wharton. The nearby Morgan mansion Ventfort, which is in the early stages of renovation, provides an interesting contrast to the elegant simplicity of the Mount.

Our Berkshire weekend was a great success on a number of counts, not the least of which is our belated discovery of the existence of the Berkshires as a destination not an hour and a half from our home. I did not give a moment's thought, however, to the war dead.

My Conspecifics are Blind

2010-05-28T08:14:00.000-07:00

Most of my conspecifics seem to think that large corporations are just the small businesses on main street writ large. They don't recognize them as the powerful, unaccountable institutions that they are. They don't see that large corporations more or less own the agencies that purport to regulate them. To a close approximation, governments and corporations constitute a single institutional network, but my conspecifics have been mystified and see it not.

My conspecifics are dupes.

Why I Am NOT Proud to be a Christian or an American

2010-05-27T09:05:00.000-07:00

Dante characterized pride as love of self turned into hatred and denigration of others.

I think of this, and the sinfulness of pride, whenever I am asked to proclaim that I am proud to possess some attribute such as, most often, being an American. On occasion, I have even been invited to express my pride in being a Christian!

God forbid that I should ever express any such pride. For to do so is to pervert the gratitude and joy that I feel to be a Christian into the vainglorious and mean spirited denigration of all those who are not. Moreover, being a Christian is not any sort of achievement for which I may take credit. All the credit goes to Jesus, and if I presume to be proud I must presume to share in His glory in my own right which I certainly do not. Finally, if I boast of my Christianity, I set myself up for judgment as an ideal practitioner of the faith, and I am the least worthy of all Christians to assume such a role.

I am grateful to be a Christian. I am blessed and joyful. I am awestruck. I cannot be proud.

Nor am I proud to be an American. I am grateful and happy to live in a society which affords relative freedom and prosperity, but I am unwilling to declare that I am a better human being on account of my being a subject of the United States than those who are not or that my fellow subjects are worthier of my esteem and compassion solely by virtue of their domicile than those who dwell elsewhere. Moreover, I did not create the positive conditions in America for which I am grateful, and I am an American primarily because I was born in America to American parents. How can I take credit for any of this without usurping it and wallowing in vainglory? I submit that I cannot and that to express pride in being an American would, therefore, be foolish.

Balloon Juice » Blog Archive » What Exactly Are They Supposed To Do?

2010-05-25T10:59:00.000-07:00

Balloon Juice » Blog Archive » What Exactly Are They Supposed To Do?

This is an excellent point. The capabilities to deal with a disaster like this BP snafu do not seem to exist. Arguably, we should insist on their development before assuming the risk that they will occur. NASA needs to put its brain trust to work.

Bipartisan Senate bill aims to take 'retarded' out of federal lexicon - TheHill.com

2010-05-25T10:54:00.000-07:00

Bipartisan Senate bill aims to take 'retarded' out of federal lexicon - TheHill.com

"Intellectual disability" seems apt as a label, but it could very well apply to everyone who is not a genius. Or is genius level intellect also an abnormality of which folks may be said to suffer?

Now can everyone use retard and retarded in the comedic sense freely?

When I Let Myself Feel

2010-05-24T09:54:00.001-07:00

I've made a huge mistake over the years in thinking that medication was all I needed to deal with my anxiety and depression. Medication and alcohol have just been ways of avoiding having feelings and listening to what my unconscious has been trying to tell me. I have always been afraid that it will be demons all the way down. That the self loathing I feel is utterly justified and that I truly am a total piece a shit and not just someone who suspects that he might be a total piece of shit.

When I avoid these feelings and subconscious messages and dreams, when I drink myself to sleep or take a sleeping pill, or when I engage in obsessive and compulsive behaviors to occupy my mind against intrusive thoughts, I also block out any chance to feel anything pleasant or to learn any lessons or to be open to love. I have been experimenting with just feeling and letting my thoughts run rampant, and I am discovering that there are some disturbing programs running my life when I'm on auto-pilot. I have lots of faults, indeed I do, but I am also deep down a decent human being, and I believe I am capable of giving and receiving love.

What do I have to fear when I have already assumed the worst of myself?

Bluebird of Unhappiness

2010-05-22T12:41:00.000-07:00

Just yesterday, I thought to myself what a lucky man I am. A loving wife, a comfortable home with a beautiful garden, a great church, two of the best dogs in the world, and a job that I actually enjoy. I figured I'd get cancer or something to make up for all this happiness.

Even this morning on my quick errand to Home Depot, I was taken by how beautiful the world is and how much I had been looking forward to the weekend with Mrs Vache Folle. But I had just walked in my front door when Mrs Vache Folle announced that she has been having an affair. I was stunned. I was just not ready to take it in that my whole wonderful life was about to change in almost every particular.

At first, she let on that she wasn't sure what she wanted to do but it soon became clear that she wants me out of her life whatever happens with her lover. I saw at once that there is no use trying to talk her out of it. Hell, why would I? If she doesn't love me after 26 plus years enough to choose me over some guy she has known less than a year, then what would be the point of sticking it out? I can't make her love me back.

While we were talking about all this on the back deck, an eastern bluebird pair showed up on the feeder, the first I had ever seen on our property. I suppose I will always associate bluebirds with the heartache I felt this morning.

Now we have to sell our house, the one I love and have put so much effort into. I'll have to look for a job with health insurance. I'll probably move away from this area and have to find a new church. The dogs will go with Mrs Vache Folle. I am stressed as hell about this, but I aim to be an adult about it and part with Mrs Vache Folle (#1) in a spirit of love and gratitude for the years we had together and with best wishes for a happy life.

In the short term, I aim to get my drink on in a serious way this evening.

Defending BP is not Libertarian (except if you are a Dondero-ite)

2010-05-21T18:11:00.001-07:00

I'm listening to a libertarian on Rachel Maddow argue that defending BP is not very libertarian. He's right. BP is a corporation, a creature of the state with limited liability granted by the state. It, with all oil companies, gets billions in tax breaks and subsidies. It won't have to pay for the damage it is doing because of a government granted cap on liability and a clean-up fund that works as a bailout.

I am tired of the kind of "libertarian" who stands with big corporations against the people and who wants the government to get out of the way while they oppress others. I wish the libertarian left would get more exposure so I wouldn't have to distance myself from idiots all the time.

Rand Paul’s speech to the Southern Christian Leadership Conference in Birmingham, Alabama in April, 1963 (hypothetical) « The Poor Man Institute

2010-05-21T14:03:00.000-07:00

Rand Paul’s speech to the Southern Christian Leadership Conference in Birmingham, Alabama in April, 1963 (hypothetical) « The Poor Man Institute

What Kind of Racist Are You?

2010-05-21T10:34:00.000-07:00

Folks who think that we are living in a "post-racial" America are mostly racists.

I have encountered several kinds of racists in America and understand that all these categories of racists exist in America at this very moment.

Firstly, you have your die hard, unapologetic and admitted racists in the KKK and other white supremacist or separatist organizations or who agree openly with the organizations about the inferiority of other races. Fortunately, these are few in number.

Secondly, you have folks who believe in the inferiority of other races but are aware that it is inappropriate to express their beliefs outside of the most intimate circles. There are a crapload of people like this. Everybody knows somebody like this. They whine about "political correctness" because it makes it harder for them to express their odious views.

Thirdly, you have folks who would deny that they are racists but who actually are, often without realizing it. They don't even know that their viewpoints are racist, and they reckon that as long as they aren't overtly hostile toward someone from another race, they aren't racist. Yet they believe in the inferiority of other races and wonder why they don't just get up off their lazy asses and stop whining about discrimination and playing the victim. These people just don't get it. They don't live near anyone of the other race, go to church with them, or socialize with them, and they don't have any idea about the circumstances of people in that other racial category other than to note that they are relatively poor, often in trouble with the law, and scary in large numbers. They are pretty sure that whatever problems the other race has are their own fault.

Fourthly, you have folks who claim not to be racists and who reckon racism is a bad thing that ought to be eradicated, but they are sick and tired of "white guilt". They want other races to get over it and move on to a post-racial society and reckon that the other races are the obstacles to this. This is because they fail to understand that nobody cares whether they experience "guilt", only that they acknowledge the reality of discrimination and racist attitudes in the country and the damage that these do.

Fifthly, you have folks who harbor unconscious racist ideas as a result of their upbringing and living in a racist society. They may well deny being racist and hate racism and acknowledge its harmful effects in society, but there's a little part of them that reacts negatively whenever they see an interracial couple, for example.

Sixthly, you have folks from the fifth category who admit that they almost certainly harbor some unconscious prejudices and are working on dealing with them. When it comes to racial justice, however, they don't really go out of their way to change things through the way they live.

Add these up, and I will bet you will have a supermajority of white Americans.

Valuing Freedom Means Respecting a Variety of "Family" Values

2010-05-19T12:24:00.000-07:00

Some families prefer for a parent to leave work and stay home with small children full time while others prefer for the parents to return to work as soon as possible. They live out these preferences according to their own judgments about what is best for them, and I reckon that it is the height of arrogance to second guess such judgments. As a lover of freedom, I reckon it is better to affirm people in such choices and rejoice in their good fortune at being able to live as they please. Neither the stay at home parent nor the working parent should be made to feel defensive about their choice. Neither should feel any need to disparage the other's preference and set his or her own subjective preference up as some kind of virtue. This is true of a wide range of preferences about family life, childrearing's being an example with which many can readily identify.

I prefer to be childfree. The Duggars of Arkansas aim to have as many children as possible and already have 19. Neither of our choices is superior or inferior. I thank God that the Duggars are free to live out their dream and that I don't have to have children if I don't want to. It is nobody's business how many kids anyone else has, and we ought to affirm one another in our choices and our ability to live them out if we value freedom.

Some folks have pretty vanilla sexual preferences. Others might be furries or leather slaves. How fortunate we are to be able to gratify ourselves as we please. Good for the furries! I probably wouldn't enjoy the furry scene (I've never tried it so I won't knock it), but good for you if you do.

Folks divide up decisonmaking in their households in a lot of ways, and whatever works for them is good. Folks rear their children in a lot of different ways, and I reckon it's nobody else's affair (as long as nobody is getting injured). Some folks stay together, others break up. They know what is best for themselves. Some folks live in extended families, others live in non-traditional families. They know what they're doing, and we should hope that it works out for them and that they are happy.

Meddling, authoritarian busybodies who, in the name of "Family Values", endeavor to regulate household structure and private interpersonal relations are great threats to freedom and ought to be told often to shut their pie holes and mind their own business. They are arrogant earslings who reckon they know better than everyone else how the rest of us should live and organize our homes.

Any of us who claims to love freedom should strive to affirm others in their private choices and familial and household arrangements whether or not we ourselves would have gone the same route.

I Clarify My Military Record

2010-05-19T11:06:00.001-07:00

I did not mean to imply that I was a Medal of Honor recipient on account of my service in Desert Storm. I meant to stay that I was an honor student and received a medal for exceptional work as a student of history while at Dug Gap Elementary School long before Desert Storm. I did not receive any kind of medal for my actual service in Desert Storm. I spent part of Desert Storm and Desert Shield on active duty and contributed, I like to think, in my small way to the glorious victory of our troops, some of whom may have had wills and powers of attorney drafted by me, thereby relieving them of worries about their estates and allowing them to focus on their combat or combat support duties.

I was not "in theatre" during Desert Storm, but I was in "a theatre" in Harrisburg watching a movie one evening on a break from my duties at Fort Indiantown Gap, so I can see where folks might have gotten the wrong idea when I mentioned that I was in [a] theatre during the campaign.

At the time, I was domiciled in Florida, so the Harrisburg area was, in fact, "far from the comforts of home and concerned loved ones". I did not mean to imply that I was in the Middle East. I have never been to the Middle East. I may have mispronounced Middle Earth where I was often present in my imagination during marathon sessions of D&D. I fought side my side with Rammer, my elven warrior half brother, and a band of brothers not unlike the soldiers in the HBO miniseries of that name, except for the part about not really being in any danger. I fear that a lot of folks confused my waxing nostalgic for my days as Schlonak, the half elf wizard, in Middle Earth with my service in Desert Storm in the Middle East, where I never was. I regret any misconceptions that people may have had about this.

It happened that my two weeks of annual active duty coincided with Desert Shield and the first days of Desert Storm, and I was involved in getting soldiers ready to be deployed. When I said that I didn't like to talk about the war and my part in it, I was not trying to imply that it was terrible and frightening, only that it was really boring.

Mr Baggett is Getting On

2010-05-18T11:11:00.001-07:00

I took Jesse Lou Baggett to the veterinarian this morning. Yesterday, my neighbor, who walks the dogs for us when we are at work, called me at the office and reported that Jesse was falling down and could not walk very well on the hardwood floors. By the time I got home, he had improved a great deal but did seem a bit off kilter. Meanwhile, Mrs Vache Folle had scheduled an appointment with the vet.

Jesse has manifested problems with his hindquarters for several months now, and we have been giving him anti-inflammatories in the hope that he has arthritis rather than degenerative myelopathy (he has some shepherd in his ancestry). He also has had bouts of vestibulitis, and I suspected that he might have had the perfect storm of vestibular symptoms coupled with his weak hind legs.

Jesse hates riding in the car, especially the SUV, and has a hard time getting in and out of it and sitting still when it is moving. Jasper Stone, in contrast, lives for car rides, and I had to take him along for moral support. I had to lift Jesse into the car, which he hates. We arrived early at the vet's, so I walked the boys around the grounds for about 15 minutes, something they both love. There are so many new and strange smells for them to enjoy and so many unfamiliar trees to pee on. I think of this as the boys' "reading their pee-mail".

While we were waiting inside the veterinary hospital, a couple of other dogs came in, a min-pin and a golden retriever. This inspired Jasper to whine pitiably because he was not allowed to greet the other dogs and their owners. Jesse was likewise unhappy, but his intentions were not so honorable. He hates other dogs, except for Jasper and a couple of close friends he has made over the years. Given the opportunity, he might very well kill or severely injure a small dog or a cat even now in his golden years. I don't take any chances with him and warn others to keep their dogs away from him lest he start a fight. Anyway, it was a long five minutes in the waiting room with the boys' keen to get up close and personal with their conspecifics.

After an examination, Dr Christiansen agreed with me that Jesse exhibited lack of balance in his front legs as well as the back and that the onset of active vestibular disease could very well be the cause. We are supposed to take him off one of his meds, a side effect of which is sedation, to minimize any impacts on his coordination, and to substitute Metacam for it. He is also supposed to take Bonine, an over the counter motion sickness drug, to deal with the dizziness caused by vestibulitis. I hope we can nip this episode in the bud without going through the starvation and dehydration Jesse endured last time.

Jesse pooped on the vet while his temperature was being taken, and he pooped in the car on the way home. The poops were healthy looking but ill timed.

It is very difficult to see Jesse's decline with old age. He was always so vigorous and active. He was one of the fastest dogs I have ever known. Now he can barely walk. He can still get on the furniture, though, and he loves to sleep on the sofa. I hope we can keep him comfortable and happy for a long time yet.

My Conversion Story

2010-05-17T11:13:00.000-07:00

Over the past six Sundays, the sermons in our church have been about conversions: Peter, Paul, the Ethiopian eunuch, Cornelius the centurion, Lydia the dye maker, and the Philippian jailer. Before each sermon, a co-religionist has gotten up and spoken about their conversion experience. None of the witnesses I have heard has been able to identify a precise moment of conversion. For them, it has been a process, in some cases lifelong. So far, not one witness has claimed to have come to Jesus at a certain moment of a certain day by praying a prayer from the Four Spiritual Laws tract or some version of a the formulaic prayer of acceptance I was taught as being required.

We don't have any choice as followers of Jesus. We cannot reject Him or accept Him. He chooses us, and we don't always realize it right away.

There was a time in my youth when I would have told you the very moment I had been saved when I had officially asked Jesus to be my "personal" Lord and Savior. I was fifteen years old in the family room of my friend at a weekly Bible study. I now know that I was not converted or "saved" at that moment. Rather, I was chosen from before time and the world began. I was a troubled young Christian struggling to believe, to accept, to embrace a whole religion so much of which was unbelievable, unacceptable and unembraceable. I had the idea that I had to go all in, to take it all hook, line and sinker or be damned. And I just couldn't do it. I could not make myself believe in the whole fundamentalist program.

I gradually became an "unchurched", "lapsed" apostate and dabbled in Unitarianism (which I still respect and admire). When I was forty two, I discovered the Congregationalist denomination and began to attend a tiny church in Bronxville, New York. There I was exposed to a more liberal form of Christianity with a diversity of theological views and a commitment to tolerance and coexistence. I met Christians who did not feel led to accept the Bible as the literal Word of God; rather, they undertook to read the Bible in the light of when, how, why and by whom it had been written. I began to study the Bible in this light and to read books by critical Biblical scholars.

I met Christians who were more interested in how you treated other people than in your theological opinions, and I began to realize that a lot of theology does not translate meaningfully into action as a loving disciple of Jesus. What possible difference could divergent views on the nature of the Trinity or the afterlife or other mysteries for which many women and men have been put to the stake make in how we treat each other? So what if we hear hats/don't wear hats, dress up for church or go casual, sing old hymns or praise songs? All that matters is loving God and loving one another with all our faculties.

Then I discovered Calvin and learned that belief is involuntary (the Pragmatists were also a big help) and began to realize that it was OK to acknowledge that my beliefs about the supernatural are irrational and not susceptible to proof. I believe what I believe because I believe it, and my belief system has it that belief in Jesus is a gift, not something you can attain or choose. And I don't believe what I don't believe about the supernatural because I don't believe it. I am not answerable to anyone for my beliefs or unbelief. I am happy to discuss them but I know there's no use arguing with anyone about them.

I have been led by the Spirit to focus on how we live in the here and now so as to manifest love and advance the Kingdom rather than on sin and legalism and mysteries we can neither solve nor understand.

I am the least of all Christians but grateful for the gift of belief and hopeful of advancing in some small way the work of the Kingdom even if only as a cautionary example.

CSA

2010-05-17T10:50:00.000-07:00

On Saturday evening, Mrs Vache Folle and I attended the first shareholders' meeting of the year of the Healthy Harvest Community Supported Agriculture farm in East Fishkill. We got to meet Dave, the director of the enterprise and his flock of sheep. He explained to us that the Johnson ladies, aged 79 to 100, who own the Johnson Farm where the CSA operates receive a property tax break by having a portion of their property put to agricultural use. There are about three acres under cultivation at the moment with additional land to be used for pasturage and hay. Norbert, the farmer hired to do the tilling and what have you, was supposed to appear but did not arrive before our departure. (We didn't stay for the potluck because we had a steak thawing out on the counter at home.)

We took a look at the sprouts that were coming up from what had been planted relatively early and wandered down to see the chicken coop under construction. I'd say about ten families or so came to the meeting out of thirty shares.

We're pretty excited about the CSA, and I am keen to help with some of the work. Mrs Vache Folle may pitch in with the accounting. I'd like to learn some organic farming techniques and aim to work on that end of the business. All in all, it seems like a chance to make some acquaintances, help out some nice old ladies, contribute to local agriculture, and get heaps of fresh produce.

Customer Non-appreciation Tip of the Day

2010-05-14T15:59:00.000-07:00

One way to tell your customers (and employees) how much you despise them is to install one of those toilet paper dispensers in your business bathroom that rations sheets of toilet paper one at a time. Another way is to fill that dispenser with single ply toilet paper.

Levi's Undershorts Suck

2010-05-14T15:51:00.000-07:00

The folks at Levi's should stick to dungarees, because they don't seem to be able to make underwear. I bought some Levi's boxer briefs a few months ago, and I have been meaning to throw them away since week one. I don't know why I don't think of it until I'm wearing the damned things, but I don't. I forget all about them and wear them over and over and experience the same problems over and over. I'm an idiot.

These briefs are cut in a way that after you have been wearing them a few hours the short leg part curls up and starts to constrict the scrotum and chafe the insides of the thighs. And if that weren't bad enough, the back end simply will not stay out of the gluteal cleft. The most uncomfortable undershorts ever is what they are.

And another thing. The slit in the front that let's you urinate without pulling down your shorts is horizontal instead of vertical and is practically unworkable without wetting yourself.

Empire Starts at Home

2010-05-14T12:12:00.000-07:00

So we've got this huge military and are intent on building an empire, but we're going about it all wrong. Why would we want Afghanistan as a possession? It's a dung heap, and it's on the other side of the planet. Iraq at least has oil, but we can buy Iraq's oil the same as anybody else and don't need to occupy the country, an expensive proposition, to get it. The Romans didn't run off conquering distant lands until they had conquered nearby lands, and we should follow their lead.

Let's take Canada and Mexico for starters. And the Bahamas. That way, we would save money on transportation and logistics and wouldn't have so much of a problem with the language and culture. We'd still get practice for our youth as bullet stoppers, and military contractors and suppliers would still be fed. Better yet, we'd get to practice fighting in all kinds of climates and terrains instead of just all desert, all the time. The Navy might even see some action.

Americans could colonize and Americanize the conquered territories as they are pacified.

Eventually we'd take over the whole hemisphere at which point we should probably just stop for a while and consolidate our gains.

The Manifesto « The Dark Mountain Project

2010-05-11T10:57:00.000-07:00

I heard about this on the BBC radio news this morning and had to check it out.

The Manifesto « The Dark Mountain Project

"It is, it seems, our civilisation’s turn to experience the inrush of the savage and the unseen; our turn to be brought up short by contact with untamed reality. There is a fall coming. We live in an age in which familiar restraints are being kicked away, and foundations snatched from under us. After a quarter century of complacency, in which we were invited to believe in bubbles that would never burst, prices that would never fall, the end of history, the crude repackaging of the triumphalism of Conrad’s Victorian twilight – Hubris has been introduced to Nemesis. Now a familiar human story is being played out. It is the story of an empire corroding from within. It is the story of a people who believed, for a long time, that their actions did not have consequences. It is the story of how that people will cope with the crumbling of their own myth. It is our story.

This time, the crumbling empire is the unassailable global economy, and the brave new world of consumer democracy being forged worldwide in its name. Upon the indestructibility of this edifice we have pinned the hopes of this latest phase of our civilisation. Now, its failure and fallibility exposed, the world’s elites are scrabbling frantically to buoy up an economic machine which, for decades, they told us needed little restraint, for restraint would be its undoing. Uncountable sums of money are being funnelled upwards in order to prevent an uncontrolled explosion. The machine is stuttering and the engineers are in panic. They are wondering if perhaps they do not understand it as well as they imagined. They are wondering whether they are controlling it at all or whether, perhaps, it is controlling them."

"And over it all looms runaway climate change. Climate change, which threatens to render all human projects irrelevant; which presents us with detailed evidence of our lack of understanding of the world we inhabit while, at the same time, demonstrating that we are still entirely reliant upon it. Climate change, which highlights in painful colour the head-on crash between civilisation and ‘nature’; which makes plain, more effectively than any carefully constructed argument or optimistically defiant protest, how the machine’s need for permanent growth will require us to destroy ourselves in its name. Climate change, which brings home at last our ultimate powerlessness."

We won't stop growing our economy until the planet starts killing us.

Majority Of Americans Think Afghanistan 'Not Worth It,' Poll Finds

2010-05-10T12:29:00.000-07:00

Majority Of Americans Think Afghanistan 'Not Worth It,' Poll Finds

And they are absolutely right. This is unwinnable unless you define winning as mucking around in a barbaric hell hole for no apparent reason. Afghanistan is not governable.

Sarah Palin: American Law Should Be 'Based On The God Of The Bible And The Ten Commandments'

2010-05-10T12:25:00.000-07:00

Sarah Palin: American Law Should Be 'Based On The God Of The Bible And The Ten Commandments'

Sarah Palin is a crazy person. I used to think she was kind of an undereducated grifter, but now it seems clear to me that she's a nut.

American law is based on (a) the common law as it had developed in England over the centuries, and (b) the Constitution. It is not based on the Bible or the Decalogue or the Law of Moses. The Founders, not being ignorant and crazy, knew that, and those of us who are not ignorant and crazy know it now.

At least she allows for a quick diagnosis of idiocy in anyone who is a Palin follower or voter.

Screw Global warming; It Will Screw Us Soon Enough

2010-05-09T10:40:00.000-07:00

What can be done about Global Warming? At this point, probably not much. We should have started working on this 30 years ago, but we didn't and now it is too late to prevent disastrous climate change. About all we can do is to hope to slow it down, ameliorate its impacts, and adapt to a hotter and less human friendly planet.

There is likely to be extensive desertification and a breakdown of the Monsoon Cycle with resultant widespread famine, war and misery. Africa, already as miserable as one would think it could get, is going to get even worse.

On the plus side, that American obesity problem is going to go away with food shortages. And Social Security won't need as much money because folks will die a lot sooner. Good news for "family values" Republicans! Families will be strengthened because we'll have to pool our resources and cooperate for our very survival. The Middle East won't hate us for our freedom anymore, because we won't really have any.

It may be a good time to invest in the things that folks will need in the postapocalyptic dystopia. I'm thinking old timey farm implements and draft animals and kits for making bullets.

Nothing is Beyond the Reach of the Commerce Clause

2010-05-07T12:49:00.000-07:00

For those who reckon that the federales are powerless to regulate health insurance, let me remind them of Gonzales v Raich, wherein the conservative SCOTUS held that the federales had the power under the interstate commerce clause to criminalize home grown cannabis for medicinal use. From the concurrence of Fat Tony Scalia:

"And the category of 'activities that substantially affect interstate commerce'... is incomplete because the authority to enact laws necessary and proper for the regulation of interstate commerce is not limited to laws governing intrastate activities that substantially affect interstate commerce. Where necessary to make a regulation of interstate commerce effective, Congress may regulate even those intrastate activities that do not themselves substantially affect interstate commerce." (emphasis added).

Freedom Lovers do not Discriminate on Irrational Bases

2010-05-06T14:15:00.000-07:00

In a perfect world, as I envision it, no person would be hated or discriminated against on account of race, gender, age, disability, national origin, religious affiliation or sexual orientation. I embrace non-uniformity and non-conformity. I love freedom, and a truly free society is bound to be diverse. In my freedom loving value system, it is immoral to deprive anyone of the means to earn a livelihood, housing, and access to public facilities on the basis of the categories or attributes I have listed. One may loathe Baptists and all that they stand for, but one ought not to treat Baptists differently in employment, housing or access to commerce that is generally open to the public.

The religious beliefs of Baptists, however misguided one may consider them, do not do anyone other than possibly the believers any harm, and the performance of Baptist rituals is generally not a nuisance. Behavior by Baptists which is predicated on or justified by Baptist religious beliefs is for the most part peaceful. To interfere with a Baptist's exercise of his religion where that exercise is harmless and does not infringe on the rights of others would be arrogant, immoral and uncivilized. Of course, one may choose not to associate with Baptists socially as long as one does not undermine their livelihood, shelter or ability to trade in the open market.

Despite their misguided protestations to the contrary, Baptists did not choose their irrational beliefs about the supernatural any more than they chose their race or sexual orientation. Although it may be argued that Baptists can choose not to express their beliefs or practice their religion, what purpose would be served by requiring them to deny their identity and suppress their true selves? Inasmuch as they do no harm and their happiness is increased by professing and practicing their religion openly and freely, it is incumbent on freedom lovers to avoid interfering with them. In fact, a true spirit of freedom requires affirmation of the Baptist in his faith.

Some may argue that their own religious views differ from those of the Baptists and that their faith requires them to despise Baptists, perhaps even kill them. Shouldn't those persons be entitled to practice their religion freely and to express their hatred of Baptists in any manner they choose? There are limits to the privileges conferred on the faithful in the freedom loving value system. If religion leads one to harm others, perhaps by discriminating against them, then it becomes a legitimate basis for complaint and discrimination against those who harbor the harmful belief. Clothing wrongdoing in religious garb does not exempt it from punishment.

Some may argue that their own happiness is diminished by the existence of Baptists and the open practice of their religion because they have a subjective preference for a world that is Baptist-free. Those with such preferences must subordinate them to the more important principle of love of freedom. It is not merely one's own freedom that one loves but the freedom of everyone.

I Kvetch About How the Suffering of Others Causes Me Pain

2010-05-05T09:01:00.000-07:00

I have become increasingly aware in the last year of a lot of horrific things. There is a holocaust in the Congo as well as mass murder in Sudan. Young boys are sold into sexual slavery in Afghanistan. Girls are being raped to death by their husbands in Yemen. Life still sucks in Haiti and in other areas devastated by earthquakes and other disasters both natural and man made.

The US is still in Afghanistan and Iraq with no apparent schedule to withdraw and no mission that is remotely feasible. The Middle East is rife with abuses of women and exploitation of children.

I could go on, but it is wearing on the soul. I can't seem to keep up with all the things I am supposed to feel compassion for and to remember in my prayers. What can be done? What can I do? What can my rulers do? What should my rulers do, if anything? Where do I give money? Whom do I boycott? How do I change the way I live so that I make any kind of difference for good or at least avoid contributing to the evil in the world?

Of course, suffering from compassion fatigue is way better than suffering from any of the evils for which I feel compassion, and I feel like a douche for kvetching about it. Great, now I'm fatigued and full of self loathing. Are you happy now, suffering masses?

Democratic Republic of Congo | Genocide Intervention Network

2010-05-03T13:29:00.000-07:00

Democratic Republic of Congo Genocide Intervention Network

5 million civilians have been murdered since 1996 by government forces and rebels in the eastern Congo.

Would it make sense to raise a force of volunteers/mercenaries to keep the peace and protect civilians?

We Can't Decriminalize Cannabis Because...

2010-05-03T13:18:00.000-07:00

I have been trying to come up with an argument against decriminalizing cannabis, and the only one I can think of is that criminalization justifies a lot of police powers and spending on police. Also, it provides cover for surveillance and harassment of poor people.

Er...those don't sound like very good reasons, either.

Balloon Juice » Blog Archive » Freakonomics

2010-05-03T13:09:00.000-07:00

Balloon Juice » Blog Archive » Freakonomics

From DougJ comes the threat of Wall Streeters to come to our towns and take our jobs and live on $85K a year.

"So now that we’re going to be making $85k a year without upside, Joe Mainstreet is going to have his revenge, right? Wrong! Guess what: we’re going to stop buying the new 80k car, we aren’t going to leave the 35 percent tip at our business dinners anymore. No more free rides on our backs. We’re going to landscape our own back yards, wash our cars with a garden hose in our driveways. Our money was your money. You spent it. When our money dries up, so does yours."

Can anyone be that big a douche?

Reducing the Number of Governments a Step in the Right Direction

2010-04-28T15:56:00.000-07:00

I'm an anarchist, so eventually I'd like to see the government go away. I'm not interested in moving government powers from one level of government to another because I don't think that helps. Having a relatively more powerful gang in Albany would not be a step in the direction of anarchy. Neither would a relatively more powerful gang in Poughkeepsie or Hopewell Junction or the Carmel Central School District. That's just rearranging the furniture.

In fact, the more local the government, the more meddling it does in my day to day life. My neighbors have shown no compunction about taxing the crap out of me to pay for schools, recreation facilities, wreaths on every power pole at Christmas, and American flags on them in July. There is nothing that the Town of East Fishkill and Dutchess County consider off limits when it comes to regulating my life. My best friend when it comes to checking local and state government is, I have to admit, the federal government.

All the layers of local government result in costly inefficiencies. Every local school board has its own administrative apparatus when it would be far cheaper to share administrative functions. Every town has its own police and functionaries in town halls when it would be far cheaper to consolidate them. This could be done without the subjects of these entities' sacrificing a single iota of freedom. I reckon we'd be more free since we'd have to pay less for the same services due to economies of scale and synergies we'd enjoy.

This applies likewise to states. Who needs them? Fifty legislatures, state executive departments, attorneys general, judicial systems and what have you represent a monumental waste of resources. Consolidate them and get them off our backs. Why does anyone think it is a good idea to have fifty sets of laws, especially nowadays when so much commerce and interaction is interstate, indeed international?

Let's have one government in America. That's a true step in the direction of anarchy since we now have thousands of governments to contend with.

Frankly, I like my government to be remote. Having it right here in Kent and Hopewell Junction is a little close for comfort. Did you know that they actually expect me to license my freaking dogs? And heaven forbid I should decide to erect a shed on my property without their approving it. But I digress. I would like to see all my government in Washington, DC, remote and too overwhelmed with the big picture to mess with me that much.

The next step would be One World Government.

Remote Area Medical and Licensing

2010-04-28T10:46:00.000-07:00

I listened to Stan Brock of Remote Area Medical on WBAI this morning and was appalled to learn that the mission of that organization, which provides free medical care to remote areas and within the US, is obstructed by licensure requirements. California has a bill pending in its legislature to exempt medical, dental and optical professionals licensed in other jurisdictions from state licensing requirements when providing free services within California. Good for California if it passes.

Until it does, a dental hygienist licensed in New York is not lawfully permitted to volunteer to go to Fresno and give free cleanings to poor people. An eye doctor licensed in Illinois cannot give exams and prescribe eyeglasses to poor folks in Appalachia. A physician licensed in Florida can't treat a charity case in Idaho.

The system of state licensure for these professionals is a preposterous and unnecessary restraint of trade. Teeth, eyes and human bodies don't change when state lines are crossed. A root canal in New Mexico is the same as a root canal in Maine. A colonoscope in Vermont takes the same route in Minnesota. It is time to develop a system of national or even international recognition of professional licenses so that professionals may move freely over borders and their clientele will have more choices.

I cannot think of a good reason for maintaining the present system. It protects local professionals from out of state competition, but I consider that a bad reason.

I would extend this reasoning to engineers, teachers, accountants and lawyers as well. Numbers don't change from state to state, and laws are not all that different across the country. Educational and engineering theory and practice is the same everywhere.

I would also advocate taking a good, hard look at the proliferation of occupational licensing requirements across the country and eliminate them where they serve no useful public purpose. Flower arranging, hair braiding, and any number of other occupations have been saddled with onerous licensing requirements that serve only as obstacles to entry into trade.

Jonathan Haidt on the moral roots of liberals and conservatives | Video on TED.com

2010-04-24T07:37:00.000-07:00

Jonathan Haidt on the moral roots of liberals and conservatives Video on TED.com

This is an extremely interesting talk (about 18 minutes but worth it).

This is the Friday that the Lord has Made

2010-04-23T15:51:00.000-07:00

Friday evening on a beautiful spring day, a glass of Luksusowa vodka and tonic in my hand (another already in my system), and birdsong. A man would have to be a blockhead to want more.

What billmon said

2010-04-20T07:17:00.001-07:00

The "Epistemic Closing" of the Conservative Mind

This is worth reading. This is why engagement with wingers will accomplish nothing and why it is more effective to be dismissive.

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Yemen is a Hellhole

2010-04-19T15:41:00.001-07:00

I heard on NPR this afternoon about Yemeni girls as young as 9 being forcibly married and raped by their older husbands. Recently, a 13 year old child bride was raped to death by her 23 year old husband. I suppose "rape" isn't really the right word here. After all, in Yemen, as in some states of the US not so long ago, a man has a right to have sex with his wife and to use the force necessary to enforce that right.

Places like Yemen will always be hellholes as long as women are this unempowered. It seems to me that there is a direct correlation between the status of women and the degree of civilization in a place. The more equal women are to men and the more opportunities they have, the better the place is to live for everyone. The creativity and ambition of women, once released from repression, enriches society in manifold ways.

I pledge to avoid doing business or spending tourism dollars in any place that allows women and little girls to be treated so badly, and I urge others to do the same unless such spending or consumption benefits women. Not that I was planning a trip to Yemen. I just aim to be more mindful of this issue.

Senatorial Revisions

2010-04-19T11:11:00.000-07:00

I have given some more thought to the question of the Senate and figure that as long as we are overhauling the legislature we should take a hard look at what we want a Senate to accomplish and how best to select Senators to achieve those ends. Unless our goal is to have an utterly corrupt body primarily beholden to moneyed interests, we can agree that direct election of Senators is preposterous.

It may be argued, by those who have not given it much thought, that selecting Senators by means other than selecting among candidates robs citizens of real representation. This is far from the truth. Half of eligible voters wisely decline to vote in most elections. Are they represented by the person whom the fools who voted selected? If your candidate loses, are you represented by the guy you hated? Are the two choices put up by the political parties a genuine exercise of choice? And for every informed voter, there are a thousand uninformed and misinformed sheep to drown out their voices with their imbecilic bleating. No, electing Senators directly is wrong for America.

What is the point really of a less representative upper house? Is it a vestige of the House of Lords designed to safeguard the interests of the propertied classes from the rapacity of the mob? No, that was buit into the system in other ways by limiting the franchise to propertied white men. Is it to safeguard regional interests? Originally, the idea was to assure small states of a voice when the larger states overwhelmed them in population and House seats. That was a political compromise that made some sense back in the 1780s when a constitution had to be sold, but it may no longer serve in the present context in which states are more or less political subdivisions with a few vestiges of sovereignty.

Perhaps there are other regional and minority interests that we reckon should be protected from majoritarian tyranny. And if there are such interests, such as rural concerns in an overwhelmingly urban and suburban country, we should determine how much of a power imbalance to adopt to achieve our goals. In the present system, sparsely populated states in Flyoverstan control far too much of the Senate in comparison to populous coastal states and do nothing to serve regional interests. Rather, they provide convenient venues for moneyed interests to invest in Senate campaigns and buy influence relatively cheaply. A Wyoming Senate candidate needs to buy many fewer votes than a candidate in California or New York. This imbalance results in the kind of GOP Senate caucus that we suffer from now and is bad for America.

I propose that we slant things somewhat but not so crazily to rural interests by consolidating a number of sparsely populated, rural states and rural areas of nearby urban states into a number of Senate Districts which is equal to the number of Senators that would be chosen on a proportional basis plus a premium of seats to be determined by how much we really care about this social divide.

Senators would then be chosen by lottery from a pool of eligible individuals (30 plus years old, domiciled in district, no felony convictions, no receipt of government funds for ten years except legislative pay) who have previously served in the House of Representatives or the Senate. The experience requirement would help to make the Senate a more deliberative body. Terms would be for 12 years. I estimate that our consolidation program would result in 30 Senate Districts, and since we have already increased numbers in the House I propose that each District select three Senators for a total of 120 seats.

I would still prohibit the Senate from proposing legislation or offering amendments and would require it to act promptly on affirmations and ratifications.

A Senate chosen by lot would look like America and would be likely to work for America rather than for itself.

Congressional Lottery Redux

2010-04-18T12:05:00.000-07:00

I've mentioned the idea of selecting Congress by lottery instead of elections as a way of eliminating campaign finance corruption. On further consideration, I find that my idea also helps curtail some of the serious problems inherent in the two party system.

To recap my earlier argument, the problems with campaign finance would go away if we no longer had campaigns. One way to do away with campaigns is to do away with elections. We could just as effectively choose Congress in a lottery. That way, anything that anyone gave to a Congressperson would be a transparent bribe.

Another benefit of the Lottery System is that political parties would no longer be primarily concerned with electioneering and winning elections. We would doubtless still have factions but these would be concerned first and foremost with governance rather than campaigning. We would likely avoid the dangerous situation that we have now where one of the major political parties, the GOP, is incompetent to govern effectively when it gets power and invariably makes a mess of things.

The current system has led to a duopoly of two parties which exclude all other factions or potential factions from meaningful participation in the political process. The Lottery System would smooth the way for multiple parties and shifting alliances and coalitions with less potential for polarization into two hostile camps intent on thwarting one another. Congresspersons would be able to form coalitions for special purposes rather than toeing strict party lines. They would be able to remain independent from parties altogether if it suited them. The Lottery System would permit a broader range of views to be represented in Congress.

While we are changing the system to eliminate corruption inherent in political campaigns, let us also make Congress more representative. 435 members is way too few for a population in excess of 300 million. Let's double the number of Congressonal districts to 870 to bring Congresspersons closer to their constituents and to allow for greater diversity of opinions, backgrounds, and perspectives. Better yet, let's triple them to 1,305.

Under the Lottery System, Congresspersons would be selected at random from the residents of each district. The only disqualifications would be youth, felony convictions and receipt of money from any governmental source during the previous ten years, including government contracts. I propose that their terms in office be at least 6 years so that they are not cycled out just as they are learning the ropes. No person would be required to serve if they were unwilling to do so. If the selectee declined to serve, the next name would be drawn until a selectee accepted the position. If we are careful about how districts are drawn, the resulting Congress will invariable look like America. About half of the members will be women. A wide range of age cohorts would be represented, and the distribution of classes in Congress would largely mirror those in the country. In short, we would have a truly representative body.

The Senate, if we decide to keep it at all, could be returned to the original system where its members were selected by state legislatures or it could be chosen by random lottery. I propose that the powers of the Senate be significantly curtailed and that it be limited to voting on legislation passed by the House rather than advancing its own legislation and to advice and consent. In the case of advice and consent, the Senate should be obliged in all instances to give an up or down vote on every nominee within 60 days of nomination and on every treaty within 180 days of submission to the Senate. If it does not, the nominee or treaty should be deemed confirmed or ratified.

Tea Party "Contract from America" a Fiscal Suicide Pact | Crooks and Liars

2010-04-16T12:37:00.000-07:00

Tea Party "Contract from America" a Fiscal Suicide Pact Crooks and Liars

This story has an interesting graphic about the sources of the deficit.

Another reason I am a skeptic when it comes to Tea Party claims that they are for lower taxes and smaller government is the unfeasability of their schemes.

Nobody on the right (except some of the right leaning libertarians) ever talks about reductions in military spending and ending expensive wars or about realistic plans to cut spending significantly. They simply have other priorities on which they would spend money or create deficits, the most important being cutting taxes on the relatively affluent. They'll borrow and shift the burden to future generations just as they have always done in my adult lifetime. They'll make a huge mess and leave it to Democrats to clean it up if they can. Government will be no smaller, and overall taxes will be higher (albeit deferred).

Why I Don't Believe Teabaggers

2010-04-15T12:03:00.000-07:00

Why don't I believe the Teabaggers when they say want smaller government and more freedom? First, I've heard this same crap by so called conservatives many times before, and it has always been false. Second, they lie or are just so misled about so many easily checked facts that they render themselves utterly trustworthy. Third, their authoritarian fellow travellers are not exactly testimonials to their freedom loving.

Garden and Bird News

2010-04-14T12:45:00.000-07:00

Our new handyman came by and fixed the raised beds that I made so incompetently last year and built me a third bed. He is going to put in a fourth bed on Friday, so we will have 400 square feet (with the herb garden and strawberry patch) under cultivation plus the berry patch. With our CSA membership, we are going to be swimming in produce, so I reckon we'll have to do some canning or other preservation. My family in Georgia used to say about our huge harvest that "we eat what we can and what we can't we can".

I have my work cut out hauling wheelbarrows of top soil from the driveway to the garden beds, but I aim to do it and to plant all the beds by this weekend. We planted one already when we had that hot spell a week or so ago.

For the first time this year, I am daunted by pond maintenance. Mucking the pond by hand this years smacks of effort. I used not to mind it, but I am overcome with sloth or something this year. A pond guy is coming by to give me an estimate on muck removal and suggestions on how to reduce sediment flowing into the pond. If I can afford his solutions, I'll do it. Otherwise, I was thinking of getting a trash pump and sucking the muck out of the pond and spreading it on the lawn. That's what I was doing with the wheelbarrow loads. The grass is greener on the muck.

Jasper is getting into fair weather Kong fetching shape. He's already hunting amphibians for hours on end.

We have a new species of bird, the great crested flycatcher. I hope he eats as many flies as he can and invites his whole clan. No hummers yet. The goldfinches are getting golder by the day.

I bought a propane grill- a CharBroil Red and have been cooking out every chance I get.

Life is so much better when winter is over.

Anti-government?

2010-04-14T12:23:00.001-07:00

I have seen protesters several times in the last couple of weeks referred to as "anti-government". Yet, when they prevail, they immediately form a government.

So you think slavery wasn't at the heart of the Confederacy…

2010-04-13T09:16:00.000-07:00

PZ Myers nails it. So you think slavery wasn't at the heart of the Confederacy…